Music and Baseball

Friend Makin' Mondays -- Getting to Know You

2012-01-09T13:38:00.002-05:00

Happy New Year, readers! Here's the thing...by now I've usually done my "Year in Review" post for the recently-ended old year, but I haven't gotten any further than getting all the accompanying pictures saved into a "2011" folder...and that's on my HOME computer. So...it's coming. Just not yet. Maybe not even til February.

But until then! It's time for another Friend Makin' Mondays post courtesy of Kenlie. You know the drill! Answer the prompt, then go leave a comment on Kenlie's most recent FMM post with a link back, and enjoy the comments!

1) What is one of your favorite ways to spend a Saturday? At HOME. I have a very busy schedule most of the time (self-inflicted, naturally), and my favorite Saturday would include waking up around 10am, making coffee, sitting in my big chair wrapped in a quilt and watching bad/awesome movies til about 1pm, then making lunch. Maybe going for a run. Finally getting dressed/cute around 8pm, and going out and having drinks with my husband and my favorite gal-pal Jo.

2) List your top three favorite TV shows. Oh Geez....in no particular order (I guess), Friends, Everybody Loves Raymond and The Office.

3) Would you rather be in pictures or take them? That depends. I do love a good picture of myself, but I can be highly critical of myself if I don't take the picture myself. I love taking pictures with my stepdad's fancy-pants camera, though. I took all the pictures for my cousin's baby shower and had a LOT of fun with that.

4) Why do you blog? Guh. I hate this question, actually. I have a REALLY LONG answer, but I don't feel like it, so here's the answer in a nutshell: I like to write and I'm a narcissist. There.

5) Share five websites that you visit regularly.
a) Twitter
b) Flickr
c) My Fitness Pal
d) Tumblr
e) Goodreads

6) If you could have lunch with one person from your Twitter list who would it be? I refuse to follow the rules on this question, because there are so many. So I'll pick one CITY where a lot of my Twitter friends live and say that I'd like to have lunch with the following people in Halifax, NS (Canada): Mike, Neil, Nicola, Morgan and Scotty.

7) List a few of your favorite snacks. Apples, almonds, HUMMUS OH GOD HUMMUS, smoothies (usually post workout)....

8 ) Do you have a pet? If so, what kind? I have the BEST pet. A pit bull named Carmen.

9) Which three material possessions would you struggle to live without? Definitely my iPhone. Television. Ummm....the money to buy Starbucks?? haha

10) What’s your favorite drink? Alcoholic: rum & Diet Coke with a lime. Non-alcoholic: Coffee or Dr. Pepper

11) Do you enjoy cooking? Very, very much

12) Do you have children? Nope. A husband and a dog keep me busy enough at the moment.

13) What are your favorite hobbies? Running, reading, singing, theatre

14) Would you consider yourself to be shy or outgoing? Seriously?

15) If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change? I'd care a little bit less about what other people thought about me.

16) Who is your favorite actor/actress? You know...I never really think about this question, but a couple of weeks ago I was watching the Kennedy Center Honors, and never fully appreciated what a beast Meryl Streep is until I saw the montage of her work. So for females, she'd be the most talented, in my book. Male? Hmmm...the first two who came to mind were Tom Hanks and Gary Oldman.

17) What’s the coolest thing you’ve done this week? Uh, well...seeing as it's only Monday morning? I guess it's cool that I got myself AND all my shit out the door on time this morning AND had enough time to stop for coffee. Cool.

18) Do you live near your family or far from them? Very near. Most of my family is within 15 miles of me. It's a blessing and a curse.

19) List three of your talents. OKAY! Singing, acting, writing well (mostly academically).

20) What is your greatest attribute? Playing up my narcissism today, are we, FMM? I can deal with that. I think my greatest attribute is the willingness and desire to constantly better myself in one way or another, whether it be academically, spiritually, physically, etc. I never want to settle for a current version of myself.

Wordless Wednesday -- Four More Sleeps til Christmas

2011-12-21T11:47:00.000-05:00

#reverbbroads11 Day 20 -- After the Storm

2011-12-20T11:57:00.000-05:00

Today's Reverb Broads prompt could not be more perfect and necessary for me after the day I had yesterday. Because of some personal (some private and some of which will be blogged about later) issues, yesterday was just a shitty day. I was on the verge of tears (and succumbed to them more than once) all day long and just in a craptastic frame of mind.

This morning brought with it not only some much needed sunshine, but also a much better mood and a determination to do the things in my power (because those things are always there) to change the course of my week.

So without further ado, here's today's prompt:

Life is a work of art, or so they say. What beauty do you regularly appreciate/revere in your life? from Neha

For me, it's the sky.

I love sunsets, sunrises, beautiful cloud formations, light rays peeking through the clouds after a storm, or even just a perfectly clear, blue sky on a sunny day.

Every time I see the beauty of the sky, I feel small compared to the magnitude of the sky, the universe, and the God who created it all.

Small...but not insignificant.

I feel peaceful and grateful that we have such beauty around us at all times if we would just open our eyes and look up from our phones (which, admittedly, I used to snap the next two photos...) for a moment to see it.

A storm brewing. No editing was done to this photo.

An absolutely magnificent sunset after yesterday's thunderstorms.

Thank you, Neha, for today's prompt. It further reminded me that some of the most perfect beauty can come after a storm.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more!

#reverbbroads11 Day 19 AND Friend Makin' Monday

2011-12-19T12:10:00.002-05:00

It's a double post day! Sort of. I'm just combining two things on which I've fallen shamefully behind: Reverb Broads posting and Friend Makin' Monday participation. So here goes!

FMM: Have You Ever?

1. …traveled outside of your home country? If so, where? I've only been to Mexico. Twice. Once was in the 6th grade, and it was a mission trip with my church. The second time was to Cancun when I was 17. But I went with my mom and my little brother, so no big crazy Cancun Senior Trip stories here! Lame. I REALLY need to travel more...

2. …performed on stage in front of at least 1,000 people? If so, share some details! Not 1,000 people in the same place, no. Not yet anyway. I've been onstage TONS of times, though, but just not for houses or theatres that large!

3. …watched an episode of Jersey Shore? I can proudly answer "No" to this one.

4. …baked a cake from scratch? I have not! BUT, I have made sugar cookies from scratch, iced with homemade buttercream frosting. I just started those last Christmas, so this year was my second year to make them both.

5. …worked in a grocery store? I have not. I feel like I've done just about every other "first job," but never made it into the grocery world.

6. …dated someone who was your best friend first? No. Michael and I were very good friends before we started dating, but we weren't BEST friends. I was, however, madly in love with my best friend in high school...and introduced him to his girlfriend. "le sigh."

7. …made a difference in someone’s life during Christmas? Oh man...I sure do hope so. And not just at Christmas time.

8. …been on TV? Yeah!

9. …had cosmetic surgery? Nope. But it's something I sometimes think about. I'll most likely never do it.

10. …learned a second language? I'm not disciplined enough to do this. I took Spanish in high school, and four semesters of it in college, and retained pretty much NADA. (See what I did there?)

And now for today's Reverb Broads post:

Self-Portrait: Post a picture of you that you like, write about yourself, post a video - what do you want your self-portrait to say about you? from Kristen

Wow. What a day to ask me something like this. Normally, as you may well have noticed, I'd jump at the chance to be narcissistic and post a photo or video of myself.

Today, however, I'm feeling kind of down and blue and a little weepy. Maybe it's the holidays. Maybe it's the cloudy weather. But my emotions are very close to the surface today, so perhaps it's best that I pull out this one again:

Just me.

No makeup.

No perfectly angled camera position.

Natural light.

I hope that photos of me show that I'm happy. Happy in that moment and happy with who I am as a person, how I look and feel, where I am in my life...Most often I'm smiling in photos...but today I feel a little more like the photo above. Quiet and contemplative. But it's still me. Maybe it's more me.

This is way too deep for me today. I'll come back tomorrow more like myself, I hope.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more!

#reverbbroads11 Day 13 -- Well if you're asking me to brag...

2011-12-13T11:42:00.000-05:00

Happy Tuesday, lovelies! On with the prompt for today! Today's prompt comes from the lovely Catie, whom I know from the 7 Days group on Flickr:

What are three things you are better at than most people?

Well if this prompt isn't just asking me to brag about myself, I suppose I don't mind doing that!

1) Singing

I guess this is the obvious one. Though, I don't think that I'm "better than most people." I think I'm good...I think there are songs/roles I do better than others. But, I have a strong belief that anyone can be taught to sing. It's harder to teach musicianship than actual technique, which is a conversation I have with my opera singer/voice teacher husband all the time.

But I'm happy to have had the training I have had...and I'd love to take more lessons and get better. But since it's just a hobby of mine, it sadly falls to the wayside and I only get to sing at the occasional cabaret (like in the clip below) or if I audition for and get cast in a show. More clips are here (if I weren't a shameless self-promoter, I'd be nothing).

2) Empathy

I wear my heart on my sleeve...I mean why not? It goes with just about all of my outfits.

No, but seriously...I'm a very emotional person and it's hard for me not to feel things strongly when they are affecting those that I love or care about. Hell, even when I watch certain movies/t.v. shows/theatre pieces, I find myself emotionally invested to sometimes extreme levels. (Example: when we saw Ragtime on Broadway in December of 2008, I was WEEPING after the Act I Finale...so much so that when the lights came up and the woman next to me saw me sobbing, she couldn't get out of the aisle quickly enough. Ha!)

Sometimes I curse myself for being so emotionally aware...but I think it makes me a better friend, wife, listener, audience member, what have you. Now when it makes me get all teary-eyed in a meeting or something, that's not so fun...

3) .......

Hmmm....

I'm starting to be uncomfortable with this topic...

OKAY OKAY....

Being Photographed

I've always been told that I'm very photogenic. I think this is to make up for the fact that I'm only 5'3", I have thick legs and a round butt and ZERO waistline...and flat feet. I mean I got all the "wrong" qualities from the "wrong" parents. My mom's legs and my dad's butt (this is getting weird) would've been better than the other way 'round.

But!

I've got really decent skin (read: great, actually. I rarely break out...too badly.) and great hair!

And I've learned how to find my good side in photos and angle my face so as to minimize the double chin, how to turn my body so that it appears as though I have a waist, etc...you get the idea. I also kind of think I have a great smile. So that helps.

Photo by Lindsay

All natural. A photo I did for the 7 Days fall cycle.

Okay okay stop making me talk about myself! I'm gonna go read other people's blogs on this prompt and go tell them how awesome they are to balance out the karma of bragging.

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more!

#reverbbroads11 Day 12: Guilty Pleasures

2011-12-12T15:14:00.000-05:00

Well, so I'm not so good at the blogging over the weekend...I'm okay with that. So without further ado, here's today's prompt from Neha:

Name and explain the one guilty pleasure you can't live without. ie: that cupcake shop you visit weekly, a book you repeatedly read to find solace in, etc). Then explore the idea of how you would feel if you gave that thing up for a year.

Hmm....well, I guess the idea of this is that it should be something I feel guilty about or, at the very least, embarrassed to admit to people...and I am kind of known for owning up to my quirks proudly and loudly.

This is tough!

I suppose if I had to choose, it'd be coffee/caffeine. I love coffee so much that it's bordering on obsession. When I was in Seattle and Portland last week, I felt like I had arrived on the MOTHER SHIP of coffee obsession. The original Starbucks. Stumptown. Tully's. Home-brewed and ground coffee that my friends made. COFFEE COFFEE EVERYWHERE.

So. Many. Profile pictures of me drinking coffee.

So...yeah. I know that it's not good to have too much caffeine. It'll stunt my growth (at 5'3" I'm not too fussed about that). It'll stain my teeth. Blah blah blah. But I love it. I love the comfort of the warm mug. I love the way it smells. I love the different ways it can be brewed and flavored. I love the conversation that happens across the tops of two steaming cups between friends.

If I had to give it up for a WHOLE YEAR? I'd be very very very sad, and I'd try to find a loophole. Can I have decaf? Can I have TEA? It would be a very sad year, indeed.
I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more!

#reverbbroads11 Day 9 -- Wombat Stew

2011-12-09T11:01:00.001-05:00

Today's prompt comes from Niki from http://nikirudolph.com/, and the prompt is:

What is your favorite children's book?

Well, this is the easiest one yet!

Source

My VERY FAVORITE book as a kid was Wombat Stew by Marcia K. Vaughan. I used to go over to my friend Whitney's house to sleepover and her mother was this total hippie who would let us sleep on the screened in back porch, and we'd have nachos (you know, tortilla chips with grated cheese on top and stuck in the oven for a few minutes) and ice cream soup (ice cream stirred and stirred til it was soupy and with sprinkles on top) and read Wombat Stew.

I didn't see this book again for years. Then, in 2001 I was dating a guy named Kevin that I'd met online (yeah yeah, I was on a matchmaking site for a while) and it was going really well. I mentioned on our first date, during the "getting to know you" part of the evening, that this had been my favorite children's book. A few weeks later he showed up unannounced at my house to take me on a surprise date, and when I got in the car, this book was on my seat with a flower and a card. He'd searched HIGH AND LOW for this book, because it's pretty elusive now, apparently.

Things didn't work out with Kevin, but we remained friends and eventually lost touch with each other...but this remains one of the most thoughtful gifts I have ever been given. I am very grateful to him for finding this book for me, and I look forward to reading it to my niece and eventually to my own child some day.

***

I’m taking part in a blogging group called Reverb Broads that will be suggesting daily blogging prompts this December. If you want to join in, feel free! Go here or here to learn more!

#reverbbroads11 -- Catching Up! Days 3–8

2011-12-08T19:37:00.001-05:00

Since I am SO BEHIND on posting based on the prompts...due to my AMAZING Pacific Northwest vacation, about which I will blog at another time...I decided to just answer all the missing prompts via VIDEO BLOG! Enjoy, and I hope to be back to blogging normally tomorrow!

#reverbbroads11 Day 2 -- Stupid Is as Stupid Does

2011-12-02T11:56:00.001-05:00

Wow, what a great response yesterday's post got! My blog stats SPIKED yesterday, and since I'm a total narcissist, I'm inspired to keep this thing up as much as I can! I'll be traveling tomorrow through Wednesday of next week, but perhaps I can write a post or two from my fancy iPhone while I'm gone...and if I don't keep up-to-date with the commenting, know that I'm going to do my VERY BEST to read all of your posts!

So on to today's prompt:

"What is the stupidest thing you did this year? What about in your whole life?"

Oh geez.

I mean....I do a lot of stupid things. I'm human, and I make mistakes...ranging in severity from choosing McDonald's coffee over Starbucks to...well, some bigger ones. But in the interest if keeping you here, I'll try to keep it short and sweet.

This Year:

I've really been thinking about this, so much so that I was laying in bed last night thinking of this year from month-to-month and trying to remember epically stupid things I may have done. Two came to mind:

1. Getting really stupid drunk on Memorial Day. I know, lots of people get drunk on holidays. You're out, you're grilling by the pool, you're drinking beer. It happens. But this was probably the most drunk I have ever been around my FAMILY. Yeah. We're all just hanging out and it's a balmy 105 degrees outside (more on that later) and I'm drinking sangria like it's a JUICE BOX.

It was bad. The last thing I remember was talking with my uncle and my grandma and then apparently I just went upstairs to my mom's couch and fell asleep. Then my husband took my drunk ass home (I cried the whole way home b/c I was feeling so terrible) and I went to bed and woke up at midnight completely hungover. AWFUL. I AM TOO OLD FOR THAT.

Luckily my family thought it was pretty hilarious. Now at every family event, if I even reach for a beer, my uncle gives this huge frat-boy yell and says "Mandy's drinkin', the party can staaaaaaaaaaaart!" Haha. Jerk.

2. Not getting my car's a/c checked and fixed during the hottest summer on record. No but SERIOUSLY. With the exception of three years spent in Boston, MA, I have lived in Texas my entire life and never experienced a summer like this past one. And of course that's the summer that the a/c stops being cold in my car. My husband is a teacher, so summers can be really tight for us financially, and I was deathly afraid of it being something more than just "low freon," so I refused to let him take the car in to get checked. I only work 5 miles from home, so I just put up with it every day. When he FINALLY took it in in late August, it turns out it was just freon after all, and it only cost $90 to fix. Stupid. Could've been a lot less miserable all summer.

My WHOLE LIFE?

This one is tougher, because I have to choose one of the many stupid things I've done in 30 years on this planet. There's an incident that definitely comes to mind....and it would take paragraphs and paragraphs (perhaps even multiple blog posts) to get into fully, but I'll give the very smallest nutshell version:

In the summer of 2002, before cyber-dating and matchmaking was as normal as it is today, but after it was completely creepy and judged, I got involved in an online relationship. It was emotionally and mentally abusive and it led to depression and an eating disorder for me, both of which are much less severe repercussions than some online horror stories have, I know...and at the end of the day I met and started dating my husband that same summer at the end of that particular nightmare. So at least something good came of it.

So there ya go! Day 2, done! Now, off to see how out of control my Google Reader subscription for this group has gotten...

#reverbbroads11 Day 1 - To My Younger Self: Be Kind

2011-12-01T11:27:00.001-05:00

With everything I had going on in November, there was no way in hell I was going to be able to participate in NaBloPoMo (I get irrationally angry at that acronym, by the way...it just upsets me), but one of the gals I met through the Flickr "7 Days" project, Kassie, has helped to start up a cool blogging prompt thingy (like my technical term?) for the month of December. It's called the Reverb Project, and we shall thus be called the Reverb Broads. Woo hoo! The daily prompts are selected by the bloggers, and we can participate...or not!

My kinda project.

Anywho, today's prompt just happened to be PERFECT, considering the events of last night. Here is the prompt:

"If the you of today could go back in time and give advice to any of the previous yous, which age would you visit and what would you tell them?"

Well, let me get to that in a second. But first...

Last night, as I posted about the other day, I went with the Denton Women's Collective to Flower Mound High School to help host a screening of the documentary Finding Kind. We invited girls ages 5th grade and up, their mothers, teachers, counselors...any female who wanted to attend. We hoped for a good turnout...

Over 500 people showed up. Yep, we were completely overwhelmed (in a good way!). The girls watched the 77-minute documentary with rapt attention, and afterwards we DWC members and the HS counselors facilitated a discussion, during which SO MANY brave young girls participated, shared their stories, cried, hugged each other, applauded each other...

It was, in a word, incredibly moving. Okay so that's two words. But seriously.

The girls filled out 3 sheets of paper: a Kind Pledge, a Kind Card, and a Kind Apology, which they could deliver themselves to the apology recipient or have the counselors deliver for them. The Kind Cards and Kind Pledges will be put up on a "Kind Wall" at the school so that the girls and the other students can see it every day and be reminded of their pledges to be kind.

During the discussion portion of the evening, which I helped facilitate, one little girl stood up in front of these 500 other girls and said (not verbatim), "Girls at school will tell me that I'm ugly or fat, and I hate that I start to believe it. When I look in the mirror sometimes, I just start crying. This has to stop."

The tears came faster than I could stop them, and my throat was immediately constricted with emotion as I suddenly saw my younger self standing in the audience with a microphone.

And it wasn't just the students. During the portion of the evening while we were filling out cards, I had several mothers ask me, with tears in their eyes, for a few apology cards they could fill out.

Only recently, at age 30, have I come to fully realize that no matter my background, no matter how much I weigh or what brand of clothing I wear, no matter my hair color or how "pretty" I am...what matters is that I am kind. To others and to myself. That's the legacy that matters. The kindness in my heart will show as beauty in my face and in my actions, and that's what people will remember. I hope.

SO TO FINALLY ADDRESS TODAY'S PROMPT:

I would go back to that just-before-middle-school-aged-Mandy and tell her the following:

"Look, the next few years are going to be hard. People are going to be mean, and some days you might cry or feel badly about yourself. But what you have to remember is this: people hurt others because they hurt. Love them. Be kind to them, no matter what they do or say to you. It won't be easy, but I know you can do it. Also, don't be so quick to judge others. You'll think it makes you feel better about yourself to find something wrong with other people, especially girls...but really it will just make you feel bad and really guilty later on.

And, sweet girl...if you ever look into the mirror and cry, I want it to be because you are completely and utterly overwhelmed with the blessings and the love you have in your life.

You can do it. Be kind."

Last night I filled out my own Kind Pledge. It says, "I KINDly pledge to find something beautiful about everyone, and tell them about it at every opportunity." There is something beautiful about everyone...the trick is taking the time and caring enough to find it. And it may be something that person has never been told, so tell them.

Final Note: This morning my little brother and sister-in-law went to the doctor for a 16-week sonogram and called me to tell me that they're having a girl! I'm overjoyed, naturally. But it made me stop and think...I pray that I will be a good role model and Aunt to my 11-year-old niece and my yet-to-be-born niece, and if I have a daughter some day, to her as well. Girl-on-girl "crime" and gossip and manipulation and cattiness and competition...it has to stop. I pray that these little girls in my life will be daily aware of how special and loved and wonderful they are.

It starts with me. It starts with you.

What would your Kind Pledge say? Is there anyone you feel needs or deserves a Kind Apology from you?

To-Do List

2011-11-30T12:27:00.001-05:00

Because I wanted an easy blog to post today, and because I do what I'm told....

I got this from Jared, who got it from Tyler. What's on YOUR to-do list?

Be Kind

2011-11-29T11:25:00.001-05:00

Hey, remember back in July (when I was a blog-posting FOOL, yo) when I wrote this guest post over on Laura's blog?

Since that post, the Denton Women's Collective has been VERY busy with lots of activities, including but not limited to being featured on the Operation Beautiful web site:

...having a clothing swap (with all not-taken clothes being donated to a women's shelter), educating ourselves (well...themselves, since I've not been to a meeting in 2 months because of the show) by watching other documentaries, and sponsoring a sweet, beautiful little girl in India.

Wow. I just got goosebumps thinking about all of that, so let me just take a little side path here to say something...

I've found in recent months that I am at my best when I focus on one thing (outside of my family and my job, of course) at a time. When I was involved with Café des Artistes, it pretty much consumed me. With the very nature of what that show was about, I think that's okay...and even necessary. But if you're used to a lifetime of never being able to say "no" and loading your proverbial plate so full that you can't carry it anymore, it's hard not to feel guilty about not being able to handle many different activities/commitments.

The last few days, I've felt so much contentment and relaxation. The show ended (very successfully), I had a wonderful holiday and 4-day weekend with my friends, family and, most importantly, my hubby and puppy, and I feel like I'm ready to pick back up on a few things, such as working out (no REALLY) and the DWC activities. Luckily, this group is run by some INCREDIBLE, dedicated females who have kept all the juggling balls in the air and have been patient and loving with my inability to handle the stress of participating. To them, I say a heartfelt "thank you."

So, what better way to get back into the swing of things than with a public screening of the documentary Finding Kind! I can't WAIT to participate with these girls during the screening(s) and I am praying that the girls, their mothers, and the administrators will view this with open hearts and minds and make active changes in their schools and communities to stop girl-on-girl crime.

Here are the details:

When:
Wednesday, November 30th at 6:30pm
OR
Thursday, December 1st at 4:30pm

Where:
Flower Mound High School
3411 Peters Colony Road
Flower Mound, TX 75022

I can't wait to see what comes from this, and I'm so thankful and grateful to know such amazing young women who care so much about these issues...enough to organize and collaborate with FMHS and the PTA to make this happen.

We may not all be smart...we may not all be beautiful...we may not all be talented...but we CAN all be kind.

Thankful

2011-11-28T11:14:00.001-05:00

I really love Thanksgiving. I daresay it's my favorite holiday. I mean, I do LOVE Christmas, but because Thanksgiving is kind of the redheaded stepchild of holidays (in that it gets so quickly and carelessly passed over in favor of Christmas), I feel a connection to it. Also, I cook a lot more for Thanksgiving and am much more involved in planning and organizing than I am at Christmastime (when I'm usually just a pawn in the family plans and just wait to be told where to go and when).

Every year I cook the same couple of things: homemade cranberry sauce (none of that gelatinous canned crap for me, thankyouverymuch), corn casserole, and a ham. Yes, a ham. We have turkey AND ham at Thanksgiving dinner because...well, that's just how we roll.

Get it?? ROLL?! Ahahahahahaha.

Ahem.

Anywho, this year was no different. I woke up at 6am on Thanksgiving morning, made a pot of coffee, and preheated the oven for the ham and started my mother-in-law's cranberry sauce recipe (one of two batches...for I had TWO events to go to that day...more on that later).

I listened to the radio that morning rather than holiday music...because it's Thanksgiving, not Christmas, so it was perfectly acceptable in my opinion to be listening to City and Colour, the Foo Fighters and the like as I cooked.

I turned on the Macy's parade at some point, showered, and tried to time out all the food, while my two sweethearts snored in the bedroom. By the way...these two darlings below? So thankful for them. They make my life so special every day.

Around 10am, I packed all the food into a couple of boxes and bags and loaded up the car and headed to my dad's church...the church where I grew up and was baptized and which is just around the corner from my house.

This year, we did something that we have only done one other time for Thanksgiving. See, with all the marriages, divorces, remarriages and such, we "kids" usually have to try to squeeze 2-3 Thanksgivings into ONE day, and it's stressful and chaotic and awful. So, in 2008 we thought we'd try something new. We invited the entire family...no, really...the entire family...to my dad's church fellowship hall to celebrate and be thankful together.

Even with the inlaws and outlaws, the new and ex-spouses, the children and the family friends...everyone gets along and respects and loves each other. I KNOW, RIGHT?! AMAZING. I mean, we wouldn't want to all vacation together or anything, but for one day in the fall...we can all be together and be grateful that we all have each other.

So for Thanksgiving 2011, we thought we'd try it again. And once again, it was very special and wonderful. There were, sadly, a few missing people this year...but they were there in our hearts. The church was decorated, thanks to my dad and stepmother, and we had tons of food.

Dad carved the turkey...I'll make lots of things and try just about any recipe, but I dread the day when I might be responsible for the main course. Let the Master handle that:

I kinda love this kid...my "little" brother. I think we look alike!

Those are my sisters-in-law up there ^^. Aren't they lovely? The one on the right is just starting to show her baby bump, and I can't wait to find out this Thursday if it's my niece or nephew in there!

SO, the family Thanskgiving was a huge success. I was home for just a few hours, during which time I really wanted to nap, but I had to make another corn casserole and some stuffing for what is affectionately (or hatefully?) called "Hatesgiving" with some theatre friends, hosted and created by my friend (and the director of my recent show), Tashina. This was a much more grown-up (and not in the "responsible, some of us have to work tomorrow" way) celebration, but I was seriously proud of all of us and our cooking (and drinking) skills:

With the exception of a couple of almost disasters (mac-and-cheese that wasn't thickening and an incident in which the turkey ALMOST didn't make it from the oven to the counter but since Tashina is a ninja and saved it and suffered burns in the process, all was well), the food was AMAZING. The Hatesgiving Punch (1 part rum to 2 parts cider, plus some cinnamon sticks, heated on the stove) and the viewing of the horribly awesome film Thankskilling and the time with hilarious and awesome friends made it the perfect end to the holiday.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving as well! I've seen several posts on my Google Reader feed this morning that indicates the affirmative, and I've loved reading everyone's stories.

Now, onto Christmas! The tree at my house is up and the Indie Holiday station on Pandora is playing in my ears right now as I type.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Monday!

2011-11-11T11:21:00.001-05:00

Café des Artistes

November 10-12th, 17th-20th -- All shows at 8pm

Greenspace Arts Collective Denton, Texas

More Information

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

"I look into your eyes. I see EVERYTHING. When I see EVERYTHING, I feel good. It feels so good when I see EVERYTHING"

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

"I am surrounded by distraction. Even the blood in my veins is a distraction. Who knows why, but it is"

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

"I don't know if anyone can plan to have a life like this."

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

"To be able to write while being observed-- seems to me an important test"

Friend Makin' Mondays -- On Dating

2011-11-07T14:23:00.003-05:00

I haven't participated in a Friend Makin' Mondays blog in a LONG time...but to be fair, I haven't really been good about blogging in general, so I don't feel too guilty. But, I'm caught up on work for the moment and thought I'd play along today. If you want to play along on your blog, make sure you go over to Kenlie's blog and post in the comments with your link!

Just a fair warning...I've been told that women hit their sexual peak starting in their 30s so if I seem a little....whatever...well, remember which birthday I just had.

FMM: Dating

What is your current relationship status? (Be as specific as you’d like to be!) Married. Just celebrated the 3-year annivesary of our wedding in September. We've been together for almost 9 years total, though.

List a few qualities that you look for in a significant other. A sense of humor, talent (and this is very broad...I just prefer a man who has a hobby that's important to him, and maybe even that he is able to make his career!), compassion for others, a penis.
If you could choose to date one character in TV or film, who would you choose? And which characteristics are most appealing? Just one?! You're killin' me, Smalls. Hmmmm...honestly I'd pick Jim Halpert from The Office. I. Love. Him. He's tall, he's laid-back, he's funny, he's adorable...what's not to like?

How long should you date before becoming exclusive? That is completely up to the couple.

What are your thoughts on public displays of affection? As long as it's just AFFECTION, I don't mind it at all. I really like seeing couples be affectionate and considerate of each other. Holding hands, a little tiny kiss here and there, a man letting a woman go through the door in front of him, his hand on the small of her back. Those things make me smile. Dry humping and making out hardcore? Keep it in your bedroom. Or living room. Or backseat. Or...

Do you kiss on the first date? Oh if only you knew who you were talking to. I love kissing so much. Sometimes I didn't even wait til the first date, but then again, you're looking at the erstwhile Makeout Queen of North Texas. Sometimes I wish we could make NCMOs a thing (non-committal makeouts) in this society. I love kissing my husband, but man oh man do I miss that feeling of kissing a new person.

Biggest turn-off? Smelling bad. I just can't get past it. Breath, body, hair....it's not THAT hard to shower and clean yourself.

What’s the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? That it's a man. Hey, judge me if you want...I have no type. Men are awesome.

How long do you/did you wait before becoming intimate? Again, that's something that each person and each couple has to decide individually (or as a couple, obviously...one would hope it'd be a mutual decision). I waited until I fell in love and then I married that man. Now I just have the occasional awesome (Ryan Reynolds) or awkward (people I work with, former bosses) sexy dream. If (GOD FORBID) anything were to ever happen with us, I can't honestly say how long I'd wait.

Describe your dream date. I have always hated this question. If the person with whom I'm on the date is awesome, chances are the date is gonna be awesome. And if he's REALLY awesome? I'm known to make the first move and kiss him. Maybe that's emasculating to some men, but most guys I know would probably think that was pretty awesome. Chime in, guys, am I right??

Aware

2011-11-01T11:29:00.004-04:00

It's been one of those weeks where I'm very aware of my size.

Do you know what I'm talking about?

Most days I don't think about it. My clothes all fit fairly well to very well and I'm comfortable and confident in them.

I'm doing well at my day job during the day and at my theatre "job" in the evenings (I think). I'm paying lots of attention to my family. Things are going well, so why am I suddenly so self-aware and subesequently self-conscious?

It didn't even really hit me until this morning. I was scrolling through everyone's Halloween pictures on Facebook as I drank my coffee, and I came across a picture my brother had posted of my sister-in-law, who is just a few months pregnant. She looked adorable in a black t-shirt that had a small pumpkin right where her (barely visible) baby bump was growing. Suddenly I just got sad about the most random thing...

There's kind of a tradition that's going around with some women in my life who have had/are having babies. There's this ratty pair of overalls that they all loan to the currently pregnant one so that they can have something comfy to wear in their final months of pregnancy, and they all sign their names and the year on the inside of the leg. It's really sweet and cute....but the thing is? I couldn't wear those overalls NOW. I couldn't wear them if I lost another 15 pounds from where I am now. So...yeah, you do the math there. There's no way I'll be able to be a part of this tradition.

I've made fun of it to my husband, but the truth is, I feel really bitter and left out.

Another reason I've been aware of my size lately....we're in the process of really hammering out the details of Café des Artistes (the show I'm working on right now, in case you've not been paying attention), including all the technical aspects: lights, inspirations with which to dress the set/scenery, etc. Since it's a small theatre company, we're all pulling from our own closets for costumes. I had some ideas, but maybe don't own everything I need....and I let myself get into a really stupid, dark place yesterday about the fact that there's not a friend I have right now from whom I could borrow anything, because their clothes wouldn't fit me.

As I mentioned in my Five Things post yesterday, there are just times when I sink into this insecurity and awareness that I'm often the biggest person in the room (I typed "world" first...WHOA there subconscious, calm down). I felt that way all during Snoopy!!! rehearsals and I've felt that way at times in this show.

And before you say anything...I ALREADY KNOW. I know how far I've come, I know I've accomplished so much awesome stuff health-wise and mentally since 2009...but there is just sometimes this epic war in my mind between the side of me that knows I have a LOT to be proud of and the side of me that wants to just be awkward and self-conscious. I have to actively get myself out of these funks, and sometimes that's exhausting. Or, when I am actually exhausted, I don't have the mental capacity to fight it and before I know it I'm in a weird place and just don't wanna talk to anyone.

I'll get over it. I promise. This show will open and it will be AH-MAZING, and then I will ease myself back into running and I'll feel great.

I just needed to get that out.

Five Things

2011-10-31T15:20:00.001-04:00

Happy Halloween, everyone!

I really don't feel like doing a lot today, and, thanks to some technical difficulties, I'm not actually able to do some of the stuff I need to get done today, so I'mma blog instead.

I got the inspiration for today's blog post from Jen, one of my favorite 7 Days friends, and I thought it'd be as good a blog as any today, so here we go.

Five Things You (Probably) Don't Know About Me:

1. I absolutely loathe condensation. Seriously. I can't stand it when drinks "sweat" and the glass gets all wet and subsequently makes big wet rings on the table. I'm constantly wiping it up with napkins...even when I have fast food cups (that are paper, not styrofoam), I have to have at least two napkins wrapped around the cup so my hands don't get wet. It just drives me absolutely insane.

2. I have an irrational fear of the dentist. I get anxiety just hearing about other people's dental adventures. My favorite musical is Little Shop of Horrors, but I can't watch the scene where Steve Martin is singing his dentist song and drilling into people's mouths because it makes me freak out. I literally just shuddered typing it out.

3. Scary movies actually give me bad dreams. Even the stupid slasher ones from the 80s and earlier will give me nightmares. But if you get into the more cerebral ones (think Paranormal Activity, The Exorcist, etc.)? Forget about it. I'll be up all night long and calling on Jesus the whole time to calm me down. So why do I watch them?? I have no idea.

4. I am incredibly insecure. I've worked on this a lot, and for the most part I'd say I can walk out the door each day happy with who I am in the world, but man...when the insecure self rears her ugly head it can be a really low day. I know there are others in this world who struggle with it DAILY, so I'm not complaining...but I really really hate those days when I question every decision I've made in my life, can identify whether or not I'm the biggest girl in the room, and feel like a giant piece of total crap.

5. I still don't know if we'll have kids...ever. I joke a lot about being glad I'm child-free, and I usually mean it because I've just slept until noon, uninterrupted, OR my husband and I have barely managed to pay for ourselves in a particular month so we wonder how on earth we could afford a child. But the truth is, we're 30 and 33 (almost) and we're just not there yet. I have moments when I will feel my uterus skip a beat over a sweet baby, sure, but as for making the decision to procreate? Not. There. And I hate feeling judged for that by anyone.

Five Things I am Knowledgeable About

1. Grammar. Not only is it part of my job description to know what is or is not grammatically correct, but it's also a part of my SOUL. Nothing throws me into a rage quite as quickly as seeing an apostrophe + an "s" used to indicate plural or the incorrect form of your/you're or their/there/they're being used. Also, no this is not a picture of "Mom and I," it is a picture of "Mom and ME." REMEMBER SCHOOL?? It seems a silly thing to get worked up over, but I cannot help it. It makes my eye twitch any time I see blatant disregard for correct spelling and grammar in the technological age in which we live and the myriad spell/grammar-check options we have on our techological devices.

2. Relationships. This is going to make me sound incredibly arrogant, but I don't care. I know how to handle a relationship, whether it be a marriage or a friendship or an acquaintance or a business relationship. I don't mean to say I know how to handle yours, but if I'm a part of that relationship? You can bet that I'm going to make sure that it's healthy and that it's not torn apart by stupid things. Yes, there are times when a relationship needs to be let go because it's not healthy to either member, but the ones that matter are salvageable. I've learned so much from my husband in the past 9 years and from the friendships that have lasted in my life. Because of this, my relationships are, for the most part, solid and incredibly gratifying.

3. Baseball. I once had a (male) boss tell me, "Mandy, you know more about baseball than any other female I know." Best compliment ever. Now, that's not to say that I'm a wealth of knowledge on baseball trivia...I'll leave that to my husband. But I know about the game, and I am usually very aware of current events about baseball, even if they're only related to my team. I love the game. LOVE IT.

4. Social Media. This does not mean I fancy myself one of those "social media experts," whose main expertise and knowledge are geared towards expanding your brand's social/online presence. I just mean I know about them all, and I use most of them (if I don't, it's by choice, i.e., Pinterest). I am also pretty good about figuring out how to modify them, use them to my advantage, and use them from multiple devices. So...yay me?

(Is it sad that I am having trouble coming up with 5 things? Or is it just adorably modest?)

5. Music. Again, I hate saying that because I am by no means even half as smart as my husband (the one with two degrees in it) when it comes to music...but I do know a lot about a lot of different styles of music. I also know the human voice quite well and can tell when people are using it incorrectly. People get really TESTY with me when I don't like a particular singer or performance because I can tell that they're actually quite a terrible singer. I'm sorry, I just know that they won't have a voice in 5 years. *shrug* It's why when people tell me I have to watch this clip from The X Factor or American Idol, I just grit my teeth and force a smile and try to keep my mouth shut. I'm kind of hard to impress, but it's because I've heard SO MUCH GOOD music in my life and I've had the training to know when an accomplishment is actually being made. Wow, it's nice here in my ivory tower....

Five Things I Know Nothing About

1. Politics. And you know what? I don't care enough. Yes, important issues matter to me. Yes, I make educated decisions come voting time. But if there is a pre-pre-primary debate on but Enchanted is also on ABC Family at the same time? I'm watching Amy Adams and Dr. McDreamy, thankyouverymuch. I just can't be bothered to get ALL UP IN ARMS over what the talking heads are saying on whatever news channel. I assume that the good thing about this particular "flaw" of mine is that, at the very least, I don't pretend to know what I'm talking about and/or engage in arguments with people about things.

2. Hockey. I like to consider myself a pretty well-rounded sports fan, but hockey is just that one sport (of the predominantly featured ones, that is...there are LOTS of sports I know nothing about...lacrosse, anyone?) that I can't get into. I have nothing against it, of course (had to say that so that my Canadian friends don't disown me); I just don't really get into it. I know that the little black disc gets banged around on ice and that the goal is to get it into the other team's net. That's all I need to know, right?

3. Math and Science. I was in band and theatre and AP English classes. Enough said. I did what I needed to do for state regulations and then I promptly forgot it all, beyond simple basics.

4. Decorating. My mom, my aunt, my cousin and my sister-in-law all have houses that look like they came straight out of the pages of a magazine. I...just am not good at that kind of thing. I wouldn't be able to see an old door and think "wow that would look great in my living room," but they will take it and make it look like it came out of an Anthropologie display. Thank God they like helping me, or my house would be tragic.

5. The average air-speed velocity of an unladen African swallow. But European swallows? Got it.

Five Things I Believe

1. (I'm straight up copy/pasting this one from Jen, because she put it so beautifully). I believe the Bible is totally and completely true. God is and always was. He created the heavens and the earth and every living thing. He came to earth as a human being — He was born to a virgin, He was killed, and He rose again in three days, just as He said He would. He’s coming back one day, a day known only to Him.

2. I believe in ghosts and demons. I'm not sure so much about ghosts of departed humans, but I'm not saying it's impossible. But I sure as hell (see what I did there?) believe in demons. See the thing in the first section about bad dreams from scary movies? I still get creeped out by those shadowy things in Ghost. Yep.

3. I believe in education. One thing that has actually gotten me to raise my head from my book/magazine and pay a bit more attention to politics lately is the issue of education. I'm a firm believer that we should not just be preparing children for standardized tests. I believe that college and extended education is incredibly important. I believe we should never ever stop taking opportunities to learn.

4. I believe in a thing called love. The Beatles said it the best, because, at the end of the day, "Love is all you need." If we could all just remember to love one another (see #1 at the top of this section for reference), things would just be a little more awesome.

5. I believe in myself and my potential. Yes, it sounds cheesy. But if I don't believe in myself, how can I expect anyone else to believe in me?

Well that was fun and took up a substantial amount of time! Feel free to play along!

Tuesday Tunes -- ALL THE MUSIC

2011-10-25T18:08:00.001-04:00

I've been on a serious music kick lately...so serious that I sort of feel like I did back in high school, when I had music playing constantly -- in my car, in my bedroom while I got ready, on my Discman (SHUT. UP.), you name it.

I'll give some of that credit where credit is due, to my recent musical muses in no particular order: Mike, Tashina and Rachel. All three of those musically inclined friends have opened my ears up to some brand new artists and styles (Tashina mostly through our Café des Artistes rehearsals, because she uses some badass tunes for our movement exercises at rehearsal), and, thanks to the wonderful Internet, have been more than generous in the sharing of said music.

Speaking of technology, that's where more of the credit is due. I've been listening to Live 105, a radio station in Halifax, NS (that's in Canada, you guys) almost every day thanks to Mike turning me onto it one day...and I didn't realize how much I really missed listening to a good radio station. I mean, nobody likes commercials, but at least these commercials amuse me (minus the friggin' Casino Taxi jingle, which I now have memorized) because of the accents...and you get commercials on Pandora and Spotify anyway, unless you pay for it. But the contests, the different DJ personalities, and the different mix of music (old stuff I listened to in high school, current stuff, and Canadian music I never would've heard otherwise) is just so much fun for me.

ALSO, if the radio doesn't tell me the song quickly enough, I can just load up SoundHound (great app on my iPhone), point it towards the music, and find out what song it is and get an option to buy it. ALSO ALSO, thank GOD for Spotify. I heard an Acres of Lions song on Live 105 the other night and really wanted to hear more of the album, so I was able to check out the entire album for free (with commercials) before buying it on iTunes. Awesome.

But it was when I was listening to AoL that I started thinking, "Do you ever find yourself getting overwhelmed by ALL THE MUSIC?" I mean good lord, there's some good music in this world. I know that seems like a stupid thing to say, but there's no way I'll ever be satisfied with music. I'm always going to want to get more and more, and one band leads to another which leads me to going to see them and then falling in love with the opening act, etc. It just keeps going.

How awesome is that?

So, yeah...I mean...good stuff out there. Here's a small sampling of what I'm digging right now:

1. "Reaction" - Acres of Lions
2. "Weapon" - Matthew Good Band
3. "Fragile Bird" - City and Colour
4. "What the Water Gave Me" - Florence + the Machine
5. "Black Betty" - The Standstills
6. "How it Ends" - DeVotchKa
7. "Joga" - Bjork
8. "Uprising" - Muse
9. "Oh Mississippi" - Lissie
10. "Speak/Listen" - David Usher

Ten is a good place to stop. I'd look all those up on YouTube and link them for you, but that'd take a lot of time, and let's face it...you're a grownup with a computer and enough dexterity and knowledge to do that yourself. If you don't, well, then you're just missing out.

So...yeah. Rock on? Or something.

We Have a Show

2011-10-24T11:01:00.002-04:00

We have a show, y'all.

When I got the email this morning from our director, Tashina, I got this feeling...nervous, excited, anxious...just kind of an overall buzzed/hyper feeling. Also a little emotional.

I mean....we created something. Yes, most of the text is not written by us (we used the notebooks of Richard Foreman and Charles Mee...and I don't feel like linking those pages, so go Google it if you're interested), but the structure and the order and the intent? All done by us. As a group.

I'm pretty impressed by us, actually.

I've never done anything like this before, and even though we're just now to a point where we're going to be blocking and choreographing and such, I already have that "I don't want it to end" feeling. This is pretty normal for me. The anticipation of building a show and getting it ready for an audience is so important to me as an artist that I can't help but think about how bummed I'm gonna be when it's over. I have to actively stop myself and focus on the NOW and remind myself to enjoy all of this part, too, instead of already being sad that it will be over in a month.

I'm so proud of all of us.

We were warned that it would be difficult and frustrating at times, but those moments have been so insignificant in the grand scheme of things (so far!). This group listens to each other and supports each others' ideas and contributes to the process without being overbearing or selfish. I'm glad to know I'll look back on this with a great sense of accomplishment and pride. Of that, I am already 100% sure.

"You know, that's how it is to deal with art
because art is made in the freedom of the imagination
with no rules."

November 10-12th and 17th-20th. Be there.

(this post is cross-posted on the Sundown Collaborative Theatre Tumblr page)

Blahgging

2011-10-17T16:31:00.005-04:00

Remember when I blogged more often? And then I'd go on a blogging drought and then write a post about how I used to blog more often?

Why do I suck at this so much? Or am I just being hard on myself? Yeah, that's probably it. I HAVE A LOT GOING ON, YOU GUYS.

So I turned 30. It was awesome.

Before I turned 30, I vlogged about turning 30. Then I posted it on my Facebook page and offended some people because I said "old people are sad" on my vlog about 50 times. So then I felt awkward about vlogging about turning 30.

But turning 30? Very cool. Best birthday EVER. I woke up to this:

Yep. John Paul White, one half of the duo also known as The Civil Wars, (remember when I saw them play a short set at Good Records in Dallas?) sent me a Happy Birthday tweet. The best part? The "ma'am." He is from the deep south, y'all, and that accent just gets me all twitterpated (see what I did there?).

Then, when I got to work and turned on the Halifax radio station I listen to online, Live 105, my Canadian (and Halifax-resident) buddy Mike had emailed in a Happy Birthday dedication to me, which was Hope & Ruin by The Trews. So that was about 10 kinds of awesome. Thanks Mike and to Christina from the Midday Meltdown for the birthday shout-out!

Then my amazing and adorable husband kidnapped me and took me to lunch at Chuy's (best. fajitas. ever.) where I got free sopapillas and had a margarita.

I also got a coupon to go to the zoo for their Halloween event ("Boo at the Zoo!") and a gift certificate to a local salon & spa as birthday gifts from my husband. AWESOME.

Of course there were a gazillion texts, phone calls, tweets and Facebook messages. Gotta love social media for making a girl feel loved on her birthday!

Then came the weekend and the big party. Oh GOD, the big party. Let's just say that my best friend came to town -

and SHE had organized for my friend Abby to show up and surprise me...

There were two cakes (one of which was filled with and surrounded by strawberries soaked in cherry brandy and then dipped in chocolate), and the obligatory candles...

We closed the place down and then some. I'm told I had a GREAT time. I'd post more pictures, but a) Shelly hasn't gotten them off her camera and sent them to me yet, and b) I'm not sure they can or should be seen...will let you know if any make it through my internet filter.

So yeah! Turning 30. NOT BAD.

But other than that...I don't have a whole lot to blog about. I haven't been running. I haven't even missed running until this past weekend, when I suddenly felt like I should go on a run and SOON before the window of time is closed. And it will close soon, because of all the work that's about to get insane(ly awesome) with my show, which opens on November 10th.

Until then...I'll try to be less blah about blogging. Blahgging.

I amuse myself.

Birthday Week = Crazy Week

2011-10-07T12:14:00.001-04:00

You guys, this week has been C-R-A-Z-Y. I knew it was gonna be. On Sunday night, I warned my husband that it was gonna be an absolutely ridiculous week and that we wouldn't get a whole lot of time together. It sucks when that happens, but it's nice when I know about it ahead of time, I guess.

I turned 30 this week. On Tuesday. It was....kind of awesome, actually. I'll post about it next week, when the official celebrations are all over (since I turned 30 on a Tuesday, we're having the big party with all my friends [including my very best friend Shelly] on Saturday night and a family gathering on Sunday, so...stay tuned), but suffice it for now to say that it's the best birthday I have had in YEARS. No, really. I put a lot of expectations on my birthdays for some reason, and not even consciously. I think I just still have a 5-year-old buried inside that expects it to be a day unlike any other day that year. Most years, I'm slightly disappointed. This year, I was blown away. Maybe my expecations have changed, or maybe my life is just kinda awesome, more so than ever before. I dunno. Either way, I'll talk about it more later.

So along with work and rehearsals, for which I have homework (but it's kind of an awesome kind of homework):

...and LOTS of work to do at work (including but not limited to putting together the Big Monthly Meeting I prepare every month and substitute teaching a College Writing I class) after those late nights of rehearsal and reading...I have had lots and lots and lots of caffeine this week. It's done the bare minimum of keeping me awake and relatively alert for the things I have to to get done.

But the tired I'm feeling? Is that really productive kind of tired. I don't feel beaten down so much so that I don't wanna do the things I have to do. I just am plugging along, enjoying it all, for the most part. I think it's a good sign that I could handle going for that Master's degree, maybe. I can get stuff done in the evenings, read the things I need to read, cook dinner, attend to my husband (heh), and keep a relatively clean (okay it's not clean at ALL) house, and still do my job.

Hey, did I maybe turn into SuperWoman when I turned 30? Because that would be kind of awesome.

But really, I'm really enjoying working on this show. Re-reading all the Richard Foreman and Charles Mee texts and working with stuff I've written and created and discussing things with the cast to create something new and interesting and—hopefully—beautiful and meaningful.

(yes, that does say "Fuck Math!" at the top. You kinda had to be there.)

By the way, are you following the Sundown Tumblr to read about the actors' experiences during this process? Because you should be.

Anywho, I'm SO VERY GLAD that it's Friday. And that I'm coming up on a 4-Day weekend. And that my bestie will be here tomorrow. And that I get another night of talking about theatre and beautiful things with my cast. And that I don't have to look good on Fridays, because there was just no way it was gonna happen today.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and I'll be back next week with a post filled to the brim with birthday shenanigans!

Happy Friday!

Mermaids vs. Whales

2011-10-06T11:22:00.000-04:00

I've seen the following photo posted on Facebook with the text in italics as its "caption." It currently has nearly 200,000 "likes," around 140,000 "shares," and over 60,000 comments. Obviously I haven't read all the comments, but I'd like to share my thoughts below the italicized text.

(this is the picture that accompanied the post on Facebook)

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"

The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness. They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia. They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

Mermaids do not exist. But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish? They would have no sex life and could not bear children. Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad. And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale. At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies. We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated. Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! " (The girl on the picture is French model Tara Lynn)

Allow me to begin with my rant to the gym which posted this sign (allegedly -- I've yet to see or even look for proof of this. For all we know it's fake and has just gone viral). WHAT THE HELL, GYM? Do you really think that's going to help anyone? Do you know how many people have a hard enough time getting up the nerve to even GO to the gym, a place where people in spandex do things that make body parts jiggle that they didn't even know they had?

How about, rather than making women feel even worse about themselves, you do something else. Something actually inspiring, rather than berating and insulting. Put up a picture of a normal sized woman crossing a finish line, shooting a basketball or swinging a tennis racket. Make the caption something like "Feel better this summer than you ever have! Ask us how we can help!"

Stupid gym.

Now, onto the woman's response. I had a friend on Facebook comment on my post (I expressed annoyance and mild disgust at this whole thing) that she just took the woman's response at face value. That it's just a metaphor. I get that, I really do. And I'm glad if it makes some women feel better, which it most surely has. But a good metaphor is one that is well thought-out. This is just a bad metaphor that, frankly, offends me as a writer.

Things she says just don't make sense. Such as her tirade against mermaids, during which she says, "They would have no sex life...who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?" Um...so a man would prefer an even larger ACTUAL fish in his bed (the whale)? At least mermaids have boobs. Poll 100 men and say "Real, 100% fish in your bed, or half-fish with great tits that maybe just smells like a fish?" See what I'm sayin'? BAD METAPHOR.

Now here is where I'm gonna hurt some feelings. So get ready for it.

The part I take MOST ISSUE with is this: "We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies. We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated."

Um...hold on. What? Women gain weight because of their awesomeness? My achievements and education and great knowledge is all manifested in my thighs and my ass? I'm not fat, I'm cultivated!!

Wrong.

The thing is...I don't know the woman who wrote this response. I don't know how old she is or what she looks like or anything about her station in life. But I do know this...that response has a tone of painful familiarity for me.

As a former "fat" girl and a girl who still has some (ROCKIN') curves (I don't mind telling you I'm a size 12)...curves that I have enhanced and earned by working hard and making healthy choices (or trying to) regularly...I'm gonna say that I call bullshit. You know why? Because I have said those things:

"I'd rather be happy than thin!"

"Who wants to diet when I'm getting quality time with my friends eating cheese fries and drinking beer? I AM HAPPIER THAN THAT SKINNY GIRL AND/OR THAT GIRL BUSTING IT AT THE GYM 3 TIMES A WEEK!"

Then you know what I'd do? I'd go home and get up the next morning and cry silently because nothing fit right and I didn't feel good or confident in any of my clothes. Because I wasn't actually happy. Not with myself. Not 100%. Yes, my life was (and is) filled with wonderful people and incredible moments. But then the dust cleared and I was left looking at myself in the mirror, I wasn't actually happy.

So I made healthy changes and wanted to look better for ME. And guess what happened when I lost weight?? I KEPT ALL THAT OTHER AWESOME STUFF LIKE WISDOM AND KNOWLEDGE AND GENERAL AWESOMENESS.

In fact, I'd say I earned even more throughout the process of becoming healthier.

Look, I understand that the woman is angry because the gym made such a ridiculous, extreme statement. Extremes are rarely a good thing. My response would have been, "Wait, THESE are my choices?? Mermaid or whale?" And then I would've switched gyms.

Actually, I probably would've scheduled a time to talk with a manager or head of personal training or PR for the gym or whatever and calmly explained how harmful I thought the sign was. But that's who I am in the world.

But getting all up in arms and turning an already ridiculous metaphor into something more ridiculous is not actually helping future generations of women. Rather than telling them that being a whale is awesome, how about we tell them how awesome it is to be healthy? That it prolongs their life, that it makes them feel better and feel more accomplished and feel sexier (ask my husband how much his life has improved since I started loving who I am more)?

I think that would do much more good than continuing to make the case for "extremes."

Aaaaaand SCENE.

Off Center, Off Balance

2011-09-27T15:06:00.001-04:00

Does anyone else feel like their blogging (subject matter, intent to blog, frequency with which you post, etc.) goes in waves? I'm definitely at some point on some wave right now. I've definitely lost the momentum I had going with my days-of-the-week posts (which is probably why I never really got into the days-of-the-week underwear either. They don't make Sunday. Because of God.).

I haven't run in a week and a half, but I've had some intense rehearsals for Café des Artistes, which I'm occasionally posting about here, but mostly on Sundown's Tumblr.

And those can get really wordy. And probably overwhelming and filed under TLWR (Too Long, Won't Read) for those who see it on their Google Reader feeds.

Which is fair.

I'm feeling very unsettled and hypersensitive. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. I think that it's a direct result of the things we've been tapping into at rehearsals. My emotions and my feelings are very close to the surface, and we're working to bring ourselves outside our own heads and let ourselves experience different and sometimes new things. Because then we can channel them into creating the show.

But I need to remember how to compartmentalize these things.

Not let it affect my relationship. Not let it make me all emo and hypersensitive in my every day life...or on Facebook and Twitter, where it's real easy to get real emo real fast. Channel them and put them where they belong, for easy access when it's time to use them again at rehearsal.

On Friday, I had a CRAZY day. I wasn't really in the mood to have what I knew was going to be a physically and possibly emotionally draining rehearsal. So when I got home (we've been having some rehearsals in my back yard), I went ahead and changed into rehearsal clothes. Pulled everything we've been using out onto the deck. Heated up some dinner. Grabbed my iPod and a quick dinner and a magazine. Laid out one of the quilts under my big tree...and just stayed out in the beautiful early evening until it was time to start.

It was the perfect thing to do.

I read my magazine. When I was finished, I stretched out and closed my eyes and just listened to my music.

By the time rehearsal started, I felt refreshed and ready. I felt balanced.

Maybe that's something I should make time for at least once a week. Just to stay centered and feel balanced.

My husband teased me, good-naturedly, and told me I'm turning into a hippie. Maybe that's not so terrible.

Thoughts on Thirty

2011-09-26T09:09:00.001-04:00

A week from tomorrow, I will turn 30 years old.

It's weird.

How unfair is it to turn 30 on a Tuesday? Is this because I had the incredible fortune to turn 21 on a Friday? Probably.

THIRTY.

Let's go to Wikipedia and see some things that were happening in 1981. Thirty years ago:

The Oakland Raiders defeat the Philadelphia Eagles 27–10 in Super Bowl XV. (Of course they did)
President Reagan was shot in the chest by John Hinckley, Jr.
President Ronald Reagan nominates the first woman, Sandra Day O'Connor, to the Supreme Court of the United States.
A worldwide television audience of over 700 million people watched the Wedding of Charles, Prince of Wales, and Lady Diana Spencer at St Paul's Cathedral in London.
MTV (Music Television) is launched on cable television in the United States.
The thrash metal band Metallica forms in Los Angeles.

People born in 1981 (besides my awesome self of course):

Eli Manning (January 3)
Justin Timberlake (January 31)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt (February 17)
Julia Stiles (March 28)
Troy Polamalu (April 19)
Josh Hamilton (May 21) (He's only 30??)
Natalie Portman (June 9)
Summer Glau (July 24)
Beyoncé (September 4)
Tila Tequila (October 24)
Britney Spears (December 2)

So...yeah...there's that.

I know nothing is really going to change the instant I turn 30. Well, I actually hope one thing does change. I've heard tell in stories that women approach their sexual peak in their thirties, so that'd be kind of awesome. I'd be okay with that. I mean I already feel like I'm a cougar/MILF in training because there are so many pretty young things on the story-box that I want to climb like a tree (I'm looking at you, Nathan Fillion...and Chris Evans...and Joe Mauer...and...).

I guess I ought to start thinking about whether or not a baby is in our near future, too, since just about a month after I turn the big Three-Oh, my husband will turn 33. Hmmm.

But, let's not jump ahead quite yet. I still have a week left in my 20s, and I plan to enjoy every last second of my 20s before they are GONE FOREVER!

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 15

2011-09-21T17:11:00.002-04:00

Another BUSY Wednesday, but I have just enough time before I leave work to quickly eat dinner and get ready for rehearsal to write today's Life Well Lived post!

Today I want to talk about my baby. No, I don't have any human children (yet), but I do definitely have a baby. Her name is Carmen, and she's an (almost) 3-year old pitbull mix pup. In March of 2009, we heard a rustling in our front bushes as we were leaving for work, and this sweet face popped right out:

Long story short...we didn't try very hard to find out where she came from. We checked for "Lost Dog" signs/notices and we had her scanned for a microchip. Then we promptly got her shots and tags and made her ours.

She is very, very spoiled.

And the prettiest thing you have ever seen in your life, no?

I think we make a very attractive family. She has her mommy's red hair.

She likes to go visit the dog park, Wiggly Field (and makes the face below whenever you say "Wiggly Field??") and play with the other pups.

She also LOVES to play with her "tuggie." She has recently figured out how to unbraid them, though, so that's fun. I vacuum a lot.

I love this dog more than just about anything in the whole world. She is so sweet and good and cuddly and loving and smart and obedient and everything you want a family pet to be. I can't imagine my life without my baby girl.

She definitely makes my—our!— life WELL LIVED. Carmen, I'm so glad you found us.

When Words Are Your Art

2011-09-20T15:02:00.002-04:00

Rehearsals for Café des Artistes "officially" began last night. We had a couple of meetings and discussions last week and the week before, but we are officially off and running.

One of the cool things about doing such a collaborative piece is that we're encouraged to bring in our own thoughts, reactions, ideas for what might be included in the final production, and there's a lot of discussion in these early meetings and rehearsals.

Did I mention that we'll be not only exploring the lives of artists, but also the artistic process(es) an artist goes through while he or she is creating art? The mediums being explored are music, dance, writing and visual art. Tashina, the director, surprised me when she put me under the umbrella of writing. Being a singer, I naturally assumed I'd be picked for music, but...I'm really, really excited to be trying something new and challenging myself.

Last night, at rehearsal, we were reading through some random texts that Tashina had pulled but hadn't yet assigned to a particular art form(s) or actor(s) yet, and we talked about each one after we read through them. One of them got me thinking about something that I'm still having a hard time expressing, but I'll try...

Remember when I wrote this post and I talked about how much I loved with Kristin Chenoweth said about how we sing or we dance because we can no longer speak? Because words fail us? Well...I agreed with that wholeheartedly. As artists, we're so very lucky because, when words fail us, we can sing. We can dance. We can paint.

...but what about the writers, whose words are their art? What happens when words fail them?

I'm not talking about Writer's Block. At least, not really. I'm talking about when our emotions take over and even words aren't enough to explain or express how we feel. Let me come up with an example --

Imagine a relationship between a writer and his/her partner...or even a relationship between two writers. Let's put them onto the stage, in the context of this show, even, so I can create a world that's slightly outside our reality. Their words are their work, passion, and their art. Imagine the other relationships between the dancers, the musicians, the painters.

Now imagine these relationships breaking down in some way. The lines of communication are no longer working as they have before. It's beginning to seem impossible for the artist to express himself, so he uses his art to express his frustration, his love, his rage, his jealousy, or what have you. He paints. He composes. He releases it into his body in movement.

Can the writer still write? When he can't communicate with his partner verbally, maybe, can he still use those words, that mastery of the language, to express himself? Or does that just become more work than art at that point?

(I'm not expecting answers from this, by the way...I'm just rambling in a stream-of-consciousness thought process trying to explain this...to myself.)

I was mulling this over last night long after rehearsal had ended, and I went back and read through some of the earlier scenes and dialogue/text we read through last week and I came upon what had initially appeared to be a simple back-and-forth word game between two people. A word association game. I say a word, you come back with a word—the first word that pops into your mind—in reply. It can be related to the first word, or just another word that the prompt word made you feel like saying.

I had a tiny bit of an epiphany that I hope we get to explore in rehearsals...perhaps the writers just go back to the language in its simplest form. Perhaps it's a starting over point for them in that relationship, going back to a simple place where the words aren't so heavy-laden with double meaning or allegory or symbolism. They're just...words. Words that invoke feelings all on their own in their barest form.

When I re-read the word-association dialogue, it took on a whole new meaning for me.

And that -- I think -- is the point of this whole process.

(or at least one of the points)

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 14

2011-09-15T11:10:00.002-04:00

Better late than never again, right? I know it's not Wednesday, but seeing as how I've not posted a Life Well Lived post in a few weeks and I was home sick with the plague (a.k.a. "Texas allergy season") yesterday and also seeing as how I've been NOTICEABLY (at least to me) less positive and upbeat lately, I think it's fair to post one today.

Gah. That was the worst sentence ever. I'm blaming it on the massive amount of histamine-blocking medication coursing through my veins today.

ANYWAY! Here's an installment of:

Today's installment will deal with my family. We all complain about our families...and usually with good reason. They can be intrusive, nosy, critical, crazy, obnoxious, embarrassing...you pick the adjective and they've probably been that way. BUT -- they are also the people who love you unconditionally (despite how your Mom makes you feel sometimes or how your Dad nitpicks every decision you make or your brother still makes you wanna get him in a headlock and give him the noogie of his life).

No. Matter. What.

As I've gotten older, I've really grown to appreciate my family so much more...especially my immediate family. Yes, my parents are divorced (and re-married to really amazing people, might I add) and I have one "full" brother and one "half" brother, but these four people—Mom, Dad, Older Brother and Younger Brother—are still tightly knit and bound together. We all get along (most of the time). We care about each other.

My parents still drive me crazy, but when, pardon my French, the shit really hits the fan? They are still the first people I call. Sometimes my gut reaction is still to call my Mom or Dad instead of even my husband...which makes me feel like a bad wife sometimes...but I can't help it! There's almost 30 years of habit in there!

My two brothers are my heroes...to the point where my husband told me once (lovingly, might I add), "You let your brothers get away with SO much more than you let me." Oops. I should probably work on that.

The true test of a family, in my opinion, is how they react when things get really bad. In the past 3-4 years, my family has had to deal with a lot of tragedy: illnesses, deaths of family members, loss of work, marital strain and tests in relationships, etc. You name it. But because of our faith and our love for each other, all of these things have made the bonds between us so much stronger.

I have been blessed with an amazing immediate (and extended...but they aren't who I'm talking about today) family, and I'm lucky to have them.

Younger Brother and me, circa 1986. Aren't we cute?

Mom, Grandma and me. If they're any indication of my aging process, I'm a VERY lucky girl.

Dad and me, my wedding rehearsal

Older brother, me and Younger brother at my birthday last year

Younger brother and me, bustin' a move at my wedding.

My very favorite picture of me with my two amazing brothers.

So...there you go. My family definitely has aided in making me the person I am today, and they absolutely make my life well lived.

Feeding the Soul

2011-09-13T11:13:00.001-04:00

“Writing and reading decrease our sense of isolation. They deepen and widen and expand our sense of life: they feed the soul. When writers make us shake our heads with the exactness of their prose and their truths, and even make us laugh about ourselves or life, our buoyancy is restored. We are given a shot at dancing with, or at least clapping along with, the absurdity of life, instead of being squashed by it over and over again. It’s like singing on a boat during a terrible storm at sea. You can’t stop the raging storm, but singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on that ship.”
— Anne Lamott

This morning I was reading my own personal Tumblr feed and I stumbled upon this quote. I don’t know Anne Lamott. I haven’t read anything by her. I did look her up on the always-reliable Wikipedia, and I’m definitely curious enough to check out a couple of her books from the library.

But I LOVED this quote.

One of the things I love the most about it is that it references both the creators of the art as well as those experiencing the art that has been created. “Writing…decreases our sense of isolation” and that writing can restore our sense of buoyancy as readers. “Singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on that ship” despite the raging storms of life that are always present.

This really spoke to me and to what I think we will (and hope to) accomplish with Café des Artistes both throughout the process and once we are in performance.

I’m looking forward to decreasing any “sense of isolation” we feel in our everyday lives by working those issues into our art, as Tashina said at our first meeting, and creating something out of them. I’m excited to “change the hearts and spirits” of each other as we work on this project together and then do the same for our audiences.

Let’s do it.

—Mandy

(Note: this is cross posted on Sundown Collaborative Theatre's Tumblr (please note there are two separate hyperlinks there for Sundown's site and the Tumblr site!), where the cast members of CdA will be posting once a week about the process, our inspiration, and anything else that comes to mind. I strongly suggest you follow that Tumblr and follow Sundown on Twitter!)

Friend Makin' Mondays -- All About Me

2011-09-12T11:16:00.003-04:00

Happy Monday, lovers!

I know I haven't blogged consistently lately, but I'm happy to start the week off with another edition of:

I hopped on over to see what Kenlie chose today, and it was another survey! Yay for surveys! I'll spare you a vlog today (but you can go here and see some of the other hilarious(?) vlogs I've posted recently) and just answer them within the blog. You're welcome.

FMM: All About Me

1. What are your talents?
I sing. I think I'm pretty good at it. I think I have a good way with words...I've been told that I'm good at finding the right words to provide comfort for people, which is a huge compliment. I also think I'm a decent writer when I apply myself.

2. What is your best habit?
Wow, that's a tough one. My BEST habit? It's actually probably a bad habit, but I make it work: I am pretty much always willing to take time for me. Mental health days, a run by myself, taking rain checks on pre-made plans because I need some replenishment, etc. I don't like to be too stressed for too long.

3. If you had to be stuck with someone in an elevator for 8 hours, who would you want it to be?
I'm assuming that this is a fantasy and I'd be allowed to pick Harry Connick, Jr. and I'd get to make out with him for just about the whole time. DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME.

4. Share one odd fact about you that we’d never know to ask.
I have flat feet. COMPLETELY flat. When my feet are wet, I leave a whole footprint. Yep.

5. What’s your latest project (work, home, whatever you care to share?)
I just started rehearsals for Café des Artistes with Sundown Collaborative Theatre and I'm really excited about it. You should follow our Tumblr and you'll see weekly posts from the cast members and production team. It's gonna be amaaaaazing.

6. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
I'd have longer legs. Sigh.

7. What do you do in your spare time?
Normally I do the whole "Spare time?! Surely you jest!" laugh. But I've actually had a nice break from theatre lately and I've HAD spare time! What have I done? I started running! I read books! I slept! I had sex with my husband! I walked my dog! I had dinners with friends! It's been AMAZING!

8. What is your biggest pet peeve?
Lousy drivers. Seriously. The road rage gets BAD in this ginger. Watch out.

9. Why do you blog?
I don't know. I've been blogging on-again/off-again since 2005 and I just always end up coming back to it. I like writing. I like getting my thoughts down for others to read and comment on or maybe offer insight on. I like making my online legacy in the technological age. I'm narcissistic. Who knows.

10. Are you tidy or messy?
I definitely err on the side of clutter, but then I'll get SICK of all the piles of crap and I'll put everything away in a fit of tidiness. Rinse, repeat.

11. What’s the last song that played on your iPod?
It was "Lucky Denver Mint" by Jimmy Eat World at the end of my run/cool-down/stretch this morning.

12. Do you cook? If so, what’s for dinner tonight?
I LOVE to cook! Tonight we're having leftover chicken spaghetti, which I made during the football game last night.

13. Do you like sports? If so, list your teams.
Um, YES. Philadelphia Eagles, Boston Red Sox, and Dallas Mavericks.

14. How often do you read and/or watch the news?
I get my news from Twitter. I watch the news during major events (tragedies, State of the Union addresses, political debates [sometimes], etc) or when I want to know the forecast.

15. Did you stick to your new Year’s resolution this year?
I don't think I made any real resolutions. I kind of think they're stupid.

16. What are you looking forward to most in the remainder of 2011?
I'm looking forward to the holidays and cooler weather and my show (see #5) and maybe running another 5k

17. Shoes, sunglasses or handbags?
Shoes

18. How do you feel about sleeping on satin sheets?
I feel fine about it....?

19. Do you sing in the shower?
I actually don't! My husband does. All. The. Time.

20. Describe yourself in one word.
Me.

Remembering

2011-09-11T16:02:00.001-04:00

10 years ago, I was standing in my bathroom at my dad & stepmom's house, blow-drying my hair and getting ready for class. I heard my stepmom on the phone saying "a plane hit the world trade center." My first thoughts were "Was the pilot sick or high or something?" I sank down on to the couch next to her as the second plane hit. Silently, we held hands.

10 years ago, I drove to class, listening to the radio. I heard the disbelief and the grief in the DJs' voices. I didn't want to get out of my car -- I just wanted to keep listening. I finally walked into my political science class, where the giant screen we used for the day's notes was tuned into the news. My professor, always dependable to have something to say, stood silently with one hand over her mouth. Before I could find a seat, the building fell. I sat down in the aisle because I didn't think my legs could hold me up.

10 years ago, my choir director walked past me in the music building, his eyes filled with grief, and said, "This makes Oklahoma City look like a goddamned firecracker."

10 years ago, just before classes at UNT were canceled for the day, I went to my next class -- Theory I with Dr. Cho. He passed out the day's hymn, which he used to have us practice sight-singing. He asked that in reverence to the day's events, we sing the words. In his heavily accented, soft-spoken voice, he asked that if we had a problem singing the words, that we just remain silent. That morning, 100 or more music students sang four verses of "Nearer My God To Thee" in 4-part harmony. I will never forget that moment.

Even as I remember and honor and pray for the fallen and the families of the fallen and the heroes who see all the horrific images when they close their eyes even now...I am heartbroken that we seem to have forgotten the unity and camaraderie that we as a nation felt on that day and in the short days and weeks afterwards.

I log onto Facebook and Twitter and I see lashing out at Republicans and Democrats and names called and jokes made, and it makes me sad. I see parties trying to beat and belittle the other, rather than a country trying to do what's best for us and future generations.

Lord, let us remember that unity and patriotism need to happen more often than on national holidays and anniversaries of national tragedy.

And let us never forget September 11th, 2001.

A Kiss Story on National Kiss Day

2011-09-08T12:37:00.003-04:00

I've been told (via Twitter, where everything is true) that it's "National Kiss Day," so I thought I'd honor a day about such a fun activity with a story about one of my favorite kissing memories. Enjoy.

As the movie ended and the opening bars of Louis Armstrong’s “What a Wonderful World” began to play, he stood up. I sat up and looked up at him, slightly confused. Was this my cue to leave?

He held out a hand, which I tentatively grabbed, and pulled me up close to him again. Before I knew what was happening, he had circled my waist (much smaller at the time) with his right arm and held my right hand with his left…and we began to dance. In the darkened living room, lit only by the credits rolling on the television, we danced to my favorite song.

My heart raced as the cadence of the song was finally reached, knowing what was going to happen next and feeling excited and terrified at the same time. I raised my eyes with great effort to meet his, and the emotion in his eyes made my breathing even more labored than it had been while we were dancing.

And then the world moved in slow motion.

As his arm around my waist pulled me in so close to his body that not even a sheet of paper would have fit between us, I felt his own heart beating next to mine. His left hand dropped my right one and moved to my face. In one fluid, but excruciatingly, wonderfully slow motion, he tilted my chin up towards his face and moved his face closer. By this point I made no attempt to hide the breath catching in my throat. I allowed my lips to part slightly, knowing I needed to keep breathing, and I felt his own breath, mere millimeters from mine.

When his lips finally made contact with mine and his arm around me tightened, my heart exploded into that painfully beautiful feeling that is the first stirring of teenage angst and emotion. I never knew a boy’s lips could be this soft when his hold was so strong and firm. I wanted to laugh, cry, collapse…all at the same time.

The kiss finally ended, and I reluctantly opened my eyes. The hand on my face moved my hair out of my eyes so that I could fully see and melt under the gaze of his.

This kiss was not my first, but it was the first that caused the warm feelings that pool in your stomach and make you wonder what more there is to be experienced...and I will never forget it.

My First Race and lots of CAPS LOCK

2011-09-06T11:35:00.000-04:00

Hello friends! I apologize for the lack of content over the past week. Last week? Was INSANE. I was SO busy and SO stressed and a lot went down but it's all over now and it's a NEW WEEK and it's currently SEVENTY-ONE degrees outside (it was 57 when I left the house) and I feel like a NEW PERSON after a very releaxing weekend.

CAPS LOCK.

So, I want to talk about something really cool that happened yesterday, on Labor Day...

I RAN MY FIRST 5k!

It was the Labor of Love 1k, 5k and 10k races sponsored by Stonebridge Racers in McKinney, TX. The lovely Sarah over at Sarah Snacks sponsored my entry fee (how awesome is THAT? she has met me ONE TIME), and it was just a really cool experience. I'm feeling newly motivated after running yesterday, but more on that later. Let's talk about the race!

The race was supposed to start at 8am, so my goal was to be there by 7am to get my registration and bib, stretch, and just kind of get myself in a good mental place. So that meant leaving the house by 6:15am. Here's a brief rundown of how the night/morning before went:

8:30pm -- took melatonin and drank a bottle of water and got into bed with a book guaranteed to not stimulate the mind too much (a biography of Mary Tudor, aka "Bloody Mary," if you're wondering).

9:00pm -- start falling asleep. Put book down and turn off lights. Say prayers.

10:30pm -- wake up after a nightmare that I broke an ankle. Go to bathroom. Go back to bed.

11:30pm -- wake up after nightmare that I ran the wrong course and got lost. Go to bathroom. Go back to bed.

12:30am -- wake up after nightmare that I overslept and missed the race. Go to bathroom (water before bed may not have been the best idea). Ask husband to please come to bed so he won't be a grouch in the morning.

1:30am -- still awake. Husband snoring. Get up and go to couch. Sleep on and off until 5am when alarm goes off.

5:15am -- get up after updating Facebook status, go outside and nearly cry tears of joy that it's so beautifully cool outside. Eat breakfast (Frosted Flakes with banana).

5:30am -- wash face. Wake up husband. Tell him it's 60 degrees outside. Why isn't he more excited to be awake?

5:35am -- stretch. Watch ESPN while husband eats breakfast. Try not to nag him to hurry up and go shower so we aren't late.

5:50am -- physically turn off television and get reprimanded for turning off ESPN during baseball playoffs talk. Give a Look. Husband gets in shower.

6:20am -- leave for the race!

7:00am -- arrive at race site. Get bib and spend at least 10 minutes getting it straight on my shirt. Take obligatory self portrait:

Then take picture of sweet puppy who is being so good despite being SO EXCITED about seeing other people and other pups:

7:45am -- meet up with Laura (photographer, not pictured) and Sarah (right) and Laura's cousin Jennifer (center). Take pre-race picture. Start feeling super nervous.

7:59am -- head to starting line with Sarah (Jennifer would be starting the 10k a few minutes after the 5k started). Take a quick picture of the lovely view around the Stonebridge Beach Club. (I didn't take pics during the race, even though there were a few LOVELY spots. More on that later).

8:02am -- start race!

8:44am -- FINISH RACE. Laura takes the most epic finish line pic of me...which was inspired by Caitlin's blog about taking awesome race pics. No, I didn't hurt myself. Yes, I made one of the race volunteers laugh.

8:45am -- Find husband and pup (they'd been on a long walk, too). Get water. And watermelon! Take pic together (note that both of our Red Sox hats are getting pretty gross. I think that's the mark of a good hat.).

9:15am -- get in car. Put on official race shirt and SMILE that I DID IT!

You guys! I ran a 5k!

Was it my best time ever? Not hardly. Was it hard? At times, yes. This course had some WICKED hills in it. I'm not talking about "oh hey, this suddenly seems hard...I must be running uphill." I'm talking "holy crap where did the runners in front of me go??" hills because they were so steep.

Luckily I had a rockin' playlist that I custom-made based on previous runs and corresponding shuffles and how certain songs made me feel while running. That helped a lot.

There was only one time where I got genuinely frustrated, and that was around the 2 mile mark, after all the worst of the hills. I slowed down to a brisk walk at the water station and, after throwing away my cup, started back to running and immediately had to stop and walk again because I couldn't catch my breath. I was wearing Laura's Garmin (AND NOW I WANT ONE) and I was frustrated that I was going more slowly than I'd hoped, and I did not want to be walking but I knew I needed to catch my breath if I didn't want to finish the race at a walk.

Then I told myself to stop being crazy and just catch my breath and get over it and start running again when I was ready.

My goals were to:

* Take pictures (check)
* Take some pictures along the route (NO check. There was one point where I wanted to take a pic b/c the view was so pretty, but I was hitting my stride and didn't want to break it just for a picture. I'm glad I listened to my gut. Too bad there was nothing pretty to look at during the aforementioned unwanted walk break).
* Finish in under 45 minutes (check. According to my MapMyRun app I was at 42:00 exactly)
* Have a pace <14:00/mile (check. 13:17/mile according to MMR app)
* Get an awesome finish line pic (check)
* ENJOY MYSELF (CHECK!)

In the 24-ish hours since the race, I've done a lot of thinking. I feel SO accomplished, and I'm anxious to run again tomorrow. However, I looked at a couple of the professional pictures of me along the race and concluded the following:

* I really have let myself go a little with eating, and that's why, despite my run schedule of late, I'm still not losing weight in the areas I need/want to (stomach...)
* I have to start cross-training on non-running days again. That's why my calves don't look as good as they did last summer, when I was doing yoga AND running AND elliptical-ing. (I was also tapping during a show, but whatever).

Please be aware, I am not focusing on these more negative thoughts. But shouldn't we learn some things after a race/event that we'd like to improve in our healthy living aspirations? I think it's okay that, despite my thrill at having done the race, I have also found areas to improve upon.

I'm excited and already starting to look towards running another race (or more!) this fall! Thank you all for your support via Twitter, Facebook and emails yesterday! You're awesome!

What a Weirdo

2011-08-29T12:09:00.001-04:00

I haven't been TAGGED to do something bloggy in a long time, so thanks to the beautiful and funny Stephanie over at Lunges and Lunch for giving me a fun survey to do! Take a few minutes and check out Stephanie's blog...she's Canadian (which you know I personally think is awesome), she tells funny stories about fireman showing up unexpectedly (okay maybe just that one time) and she's really inspirational when it comes to fitness and healthy living.

Now, on to the fun questions!

1.) What's a nickname only your family calls you?
This is SO very random, but my mom and dad have always called me "Sally," and they still do to this day. I have no idea why...I think my mom said at one point that it's because when I was a little girl I was very prissy and girly like Sally Brown from the Peanuts comic strip. Interesting for many reasons, since I'm really more of a very unladylike Peppermint Patty or bitchy/snarky Lucy most of the time.

2.) What's a weird habit of yours?
A weird habit? Hmmm. Well, I probably have a few that others could tell you right off the top of their heads, but do we really know our own weird habits?

I suppose it may be considered strange that I LOATHE condensation from beverages. I'm always the one wiping it up off the table or off my glass constantly. I always use up the napkins I get in a drive-thru because I need to wrap them around my drink so I can hold it without having wet hands. YUCK. I HATE IT.

3.) Do you have any weird phobias?
BIRDS. I really really do not like birds. I think they're dirty and their little feet are creepy, and I'm constantly afraid that they're going to dive-bomb me. I was walking into the University union one day from a class, and a pigeon came out from under the awning area by the doors and I nearly flipped my shit because I was certain it was coming after me. I do. not. like. birds.

Source

4.) What’s a song you secretly love to blast and belt out when you’re alone?
Oh, survey...you don't know me at all, do you? You assume that I must be alone to belt out songs? That I may be embarrassed if someone saw/heard/walked in on me singing, ever? I mean I suppose that's how most normal people feel about belting out some jams, but...anyway, one of my favorites would definitely be "Every Time We Touch" by Cascada. It's hard for me not to sing along with it when it comes on around on shuffle while I'm on a treadmill, but I fear that the other gym-goers may not appreciate my skillz.

Oh and I may or may not totally act out my own personal music video to Adele's "Someone Like You."

5.) What’s one of your biggest pet peeves?
Hmmm...another one that's difficult because I sometimes feel like I'm SO very easily annoyed. But overall, I think I'd say that any driving on this university campus can make my eye twitch faster than just about anything else. Slow drivers (slower than the 20mph speed limit!!), suddenly slamming on brakes because they think they've spotted an available parking space (not likely!), students darting out from nowhere on foot or on bicycle...just to name a few things that make my blood pressure spike.

6.) What’s one of your nervous habits?
I'm incredibly fidgety. I have a hard time sitting still. But since I usually have to, I think I channel all my nervous energy into the one nervous habit that I've never been able to shake and probably never will: I'm a nailbiter. Always have been. I don't even realize I'm doing it half the time. I've tried on NUMEROUS occasions to break the habit, and I'll do really well for a few weeks...and then I gnaw them all off while in traffic (see #5 above) or something.

7.) What side of the bed do you sleep on?
The right side. MY SIDE.

8.) What was your first stuffed animal and it’s name?
I don't remember it's name...but I know I was VERY little, and it was a pink stuffed bear. The box it came in was its "chair" and I would sit in my own little chair next to it and we would watch t.v. I'm sure we were very cute.

9.) What’s the drink you always order at Starbucks?
How much money do I have? Usually it's just a Pike Place roast if I've only got a few bucks. But if I'm feeling treat-y or I have a gift card it's a soy, sugar-free hazelnut latte (in the colder months) or an iced coffee (in the summertime).

10.) What’s a beauty rule you preach, but never actually practice?
Well I wouldn't say never...but I definitely think it's incredibly important to wash your face every night..or at least take off your eye makeup. I am pretty good about doing this, especially in the summer when my face feels nasty after sweating all day or running, but I admit to being super lazy about this at times. Even my husband chastises me about it.

11.) Which way do you face in the shower?
I stand with my back to the water unless I'm washing/rinsing my face. I never understood why people in the movies faced the shower....most of your hair is on the BACK of your head, isn't it? I don't get it.

12.) Do you have any ‘weird’ body ‘skills’?
I'm enjoying that both "weird" and "skills" are in quotation marks. It amuses me. I mean...I don't know? I can pick up things with my toes like a monkey. Is that a "weird" "skill?"

13.) What’s your favorite comfort food thats ‘bad’ but you love to eat it anyways?
Again with the quotes! "Bad?" As in it's been naughty? Or that it's generally frowned upon as an unhealthy food choice? The answer is pizza. I could eat pizza 5 nights a week and, as long as it wasn't the same kind from the same place each night, never ever get tired of it. I LOVE PIZZA.

14.) What’s a phrase or exclamation you always say?
"Dude." I use it a LOT.

15.) Time to sleep, what are you actually wearing?
Wouldn't you like to know?? Seriously, I usually wear a t-shirt or tank top with panties. I get SUPER hot, even in the winter, and I can't stand having PJ pants all tangled up around my legs. Since I was a child I've been known to wake up with my nightgown/shirt/pants tossed across the room in my sleep. Lately I've been wearing prettier nightgowns to bed, but even those get all tangled up around me and I hate it.

16.) What did you used to wear that you thought was cool but now you realize it wasn’t that hot?
Oh lord, probably LOTS of things, but the first one that came to mind was the super sexy (NOT) black eyeliner/white eyeliner combination back in the 90s. Ugh. Thank GOD that trend went way out of style and never looked back.

Source

Well that was fun! And now I'm thinking maybe I kind of am a weirdo, with some of these answers...

So, whom shall I tag? How about these four awesome people:

1. Rachel at We Are the Naslunds
2. Lindsay at Coffee. Camera. Kombucha. Keyboard.
3. Laura Leigh at .....
4. Sarah at Sarah Snacks

Have fun!

Fitness Friday -- First 5k Edition

2011-08-26T11:05:00.000-04:00

Good morning, friends! (Don't you love how I only post a Fitness Friday when I'm not completely embarrassed about the last weeks' activities? Oh well, at least I can admit it, right? RIGHT?)

So it's FRIDAY,and I'm doing my best to wake up and get the day moving after staying up way, way too late last night.

But sleepy though I may be, I"m feeling pretty great this morning. A little sore, but incredibly accomplished. You see, yesterday, I had a really good run. And I had a pretty good run on Monday, too! Let's talk about Monday's first....

After last Thursday's quite grumpy post, I tried to get myself out of my funk by going for a treadmill run. I left that run feeling even poopier because my pace SUCKED and it was really hard. Just goes to show you that sometimes even exercise can't bust you out of your funk, and you just have to have a crappy day. Well, on Monday I got on the treadmill again and thought, "Okay, treadmill...why should I let you slow me down??"

So, instead of picking the speed I usually pick, I bumped it up until it showed me a speed that would give me a pace/mile similar to what I'd been achieving outside. Then I covered up the display and decided to run for 30 minutes. I actually ran for 32:39 because I wanted to finish a song. I lifted up the towel and saw that I'd achieved 2.45 miles at a pace of 13:19/mile. My fastest outside so far has been 13:06, so I was pretty pleased!

My plan was to run again on Wednesday, but we got invited to a Red Sox/Rangers game, so I decided I'd just go Thursday.

All day yesterday, I was waffling about whether or not I wanted to go run. I was THIS CLOSE to just skipping it. Then I got a series of messages from the amazing Sarah over at Sarah Snacks informing me that she'd just registered us for the Labor of Love race in McKinney, Texas on Labor Day (she's doing the 10k, I'm doing the 5k). First of all, HOW AWESOME is Sarah for sponsoring me for my first 5k?! Do me a favor and go visit her blog and tell her how awesome she is for doing that for me...

So....all thoughts of skipping my run flew immediately out the window since now I'm actually running a 5k for the first time ever in about a week. Cue the butterflies in my tummy. Eeeek! I've already started formulating a plan (which may or may not include a LOT of googling about "tips for your first 5k") and I'm very excited to be participating with Sarah and having Laura along for the ride for support and photography.

I got to the gym yesterday intending to do a repeat of Monday's treadmill run, but since it was the first day of classes, the place was MOBBED, and no treadmills were available. So I headed upstairs to the indoor track and decided I really oughta push myself past my typical 2.5-ish mile mark since I have to run 3.1 in a week. A few things I did differently than usual as I ran in circles:

I refused to look at the digital clock on each lap, so I wouldn't worry about time
I counted DOWN the laps, instead of up. This actually helped a LOT mentally...I was counting how many I had left, rather than how many I still had to go. Plus I always lose count and err on the side of caution, so who knows if I actually even ran more than the 3.13 miles that 25 laps approximately equals.
I stopped a couple of times to stretch/slow down/walk but not for long. I wanted to keep going...not to push my body too hard, but because I wanted to keep running.
I made an effort to try to go a little faster when I felt good, but didn't try to maintain a ridiculous pace if I needed to catch my breath a little.

The result? 3.13 (ish) miles in 40:23 with an average pace of 12:54/mile!

Who's awesome? THIS GIRL

I was REALLY proud of myself and I felt really accomplished that I'd run a 5k (in circles, but still...) in less than 45 minutes.

I also learned that I need to do this a few times next week to get my body used to it before I do it outdoors. I felt great for the first 2 miles, started getting tired around 2.5, which is what my body is used to running, and really had to give myself some pep talks in those last 5 or 6 laps because my body was really getting tired. In retrospect I suppose I could've stopped/slowed down to stretch and keep my body feeling good, but I was afraid I wouldn't start back up again. Live and learn, right?

SO YEAH! Good week! Didn't run as MUCH as I would've liked, but it was a very accomplished week for me mentally and my pace/mile even improved a little bit.

I've also found that having some good tunes can really pump me up in a run. Here's what my iPod decided I should hear yesterday:

I'm not gonna lie...every time I hear "Club Can't Handle Me" on a run, I can't help but go a little faster and get excited. That's one I'm gonna have to make SURE comes up on my playlist when I run on Labor Day!

Sorry for such a LONG post, but I am very excited about my running right now, and I am really proud of this crazy body of mine for adapting to a spot where I can say things I never thought I'd say ("I miss running!" "2 miles is easy!" etc.).

Have a GREAT weekend!

That Other Thing in my Blog Title

2011-08-25T11:15:00.001-04:00

BASEBALL!

Just the other day I was thinking to myself, "Self! Your blog is called 'Music and Baseball,' and yet you NEVER talk about baseball!" Self was right. I do LOVE baseball. Love love LOVE it. But I don't really blog/write about it. Why? Because I'm not a sports blogger. There are others out there who would do a MUCH better job writing about games/players, etc. I just love watching it.

Last night, some friends of ours we haven't spent time with in FOREVER scored some pretty sweet seats to the Rangers game and, since the Red Sox (OUR TEAM!!) were in town for a 4-game series, they invited us!

I absolutely love the Ballpark in Arlington (even though now we have to pass by the Death Star aka Cowboys Stadium [gag] to get there), and I just LOVE being at baseball games.

There was a teeeeeeeeny tiny little bit of rain that came through Dallas right before the game (what a tease you are, Rain) that cooled things down to a nice, breezy 85 degrees -- which felt like HEAVEN -- and gave us some lovely clouds.

The Rangers got a pretty good thumping from Josh Beckett and the Red Sox (final score: 13-2), and since we were only about 20-ish rows behind the Red Sox dugout, I was geeking out nonstop at being so close to all my boyfriends and husbands on the Red Sox roster.

I was gonna talk about how much I hate it when good-natured trash-talking crosses the line into people being jackasses, but I don't wanna talk about the negative. We had a GREAT time at the game!

I also ran into LAURA and her boyfriend Matt after the game, but I was STUPID and forgot to snap a quick picture. BAD Blogger!

I did manage to get video of the beast that is Jonathan Papelbon delivering the final strike for the last out of the game (notice how many Rangers fans are left...NOT MANY) and a picture of the Red Sox on the field after the game.

(ETA: that video quality is CRAP! Watch it in HD here on Vimeo instead)

Then I had to snap a picture of the Death Star on the walk back to the car...because even though it is the Place Where Evil is Created, it is quite pretty all lit up at night:

All in all it was a VERY fun night of baseball! Thanks again to our friends Aaron and Ashley for the great seats and thank you to the RED SOX for just being amazing. Go Sox!

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 13

2011-08-24T14:31:00.001-04:00

I can't believe this is WEEK 13! Crazy! Let's get to it!

So, what is Life Well Lived? It's very simply a celebration of the things (big or small) that enrich our everyday lives. So let's talk about today's things that, I feel, make my life WELL LIVED.
(Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!)

Today I wanna talk about how my life is well lived because I am surrounded by talented people in my life. There is NO WAY I am gonna be able to mention every single talented person in my life in this post, so PLEASE don't get hurt/offended/butthurt about it! I just wanna call attention to a few:

Right now, some of my friends in Sundown Collaborative Theatre are performing their show Happily Ever After (written and directed by Cody Lucas, who is also performing in the production) at the FringeNYC Festival in New York, NY. They have been relentlessly rehearsing this show for four months...in garages (in stifling triple-digit temperatures, mind you) in dance studios, wherever they can find a place. And on Monday night? They performed it at the festival.

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

Yesterday, my friend Tashina (pictured below as a creepy-as-hell Rapunzel) posted on her Twitter that their performance was reviewed and that she was pretty much overwhelmed (in a good way!) by how well they were received. Check out their amazing review here.

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

Also, Tashina and Travis (pictured below, left) (that's Zane on the right) have posted trip diaries on TheaterJones.com. You can read those here and here. I will admit that I got a little verklempt reading both the trip diaries and the review. I'm VERY proud of my friends. Proud of them for their accomplishment, and proud that they are representing little ol' Denton, Texas in New York City as well as they are. Also? I cannot WAIT to work with them on their next production, Cafe des Artistes, in November (Tashina is directing it, and it's gonna be awesome).

Photo by Tiffany Hillan

Also, even though I talked about this yesterday already, I'm SUPER proud of my friends in Manic Bloom for making their very first (awesome) music video. It's so awesome to see the product of your friends' labor when they are so passionate about what they do, and I couldn't help but smile the entire time I watched their video.

Finally, I just wanna share some YouTube videos of some of my friends' performances. The first one is my AMAZING husband in a production of Pirates of Penzance:

My friend Andrew Tinker's official music video...he's like Jason Mraz, only cuter!

My good friend Max, (whom I mayyyyyy have a teeny tiny little talent crush on) singing "This is the Moment" and just generally being awesome:

And FINALLY, one of my favorite videos I've ever uploaded -- my friends dancing in a producion we did of Crazy For You back in 2009.

I LOVE TAPPING! I wish I could do it!

ANYWHO, not bad for just a VERY SMALL SAMPLING of the talented people in my life, huh? Seriously, I could devote an entire blog to the talent pool of my friends and this Dallas/Ft. Worth community, but for now, I'll just stick with this post.

So there you have it! Another week of praising what things make my life WELL LIVED! I encourage you to play along and write your own post! Happy Wednesday!

Tuesday Tunes -- Manic Bloom, "In Loving Memory"

2011-08-23T10:39:00.000-04:00

I had a TOTALLY different blog post in mind for Tuesday Tunes today, but when I got to work and opened up my social networking sites, I did a big ol' Homer Simpson "D'OH!" because I had TOTALLY FORGOTTEN that today is a very special day for my friends in the Nashville-based melodic rock band Manic Bloom.

First of all, I feel a bit pretentious calling them my "friends." Yes, I have met them a few times and I got some hugs and such (be jealous...they ARE as gorgeous as they look on t.v./the internet). But how did I find out about them? I actually went to church back in high school with their keyboard player, Jeff (they call him "Hildee." I just can't...he's always Jeff to me...call me stubborn I guess!). When I reconnected with him on Facebook, I found out he was in this band, and that they were going to be playing in Arlington (about an hour from where I live), so I drove out there one night to say hi to Jeff and check out the band.

I. Loved. Them.

Seriously, I haven't rocked out that much at a concert since I was in the early days of college. (I know you're looking at that picture of me on the sidebar and laughing uproariously at the thought of me "rocking out" to anything, but....it was my own white-girl version of rocking out, so SHUT UP!)

Since then I've also seen them play IN Nashville (BFF girls trip back in January) and again when they played at an event where I work (on a college campus).

So what's so special about today? TODAY they released their very first official music video for the track "Death and Conversation" off their album In Loving Memory. Check out the vid:

I had a HUGE smile on my face when I was done watching the video. SUPER proud of these guys!! They'll be playing here in Denton again at the UNT Friends & Family weekend on September 24th, and I can't WAIT to hug all of them and hear them play again!

Also? You should TOTALLY get the album on iTunes. It's really really good, and perfect for getting you through those tough last few minutes/miles of a workout (believe me...I know from experience).

Plus? They are just kind, funny, caring guys who happen to also be immensely talented. And funny. And talented. (seriously, check out some of the other videos on their YouTube page...you'll crack up)

So today? Enjoy some MANIC BLOOM!

Party on, Garth! /really bad air guitar

Friend Makin' Mondays -- The Last Thing

2011-08-22T11:11:00.001-04:00

Happy Monday, lovers!

Since it's Monday,it's time again for:

I hopped on over to see what Kenlie chose today, and it was another survey! Which means I decided to do another vlog! (Um...you're welcome?)

Here are the questions:

FMM: The Last Thing

1) What is the title of the last book you read?
2) What is the last movie you saw in a theater?
3) Briefly describe the last person you saw today.
4) Which store did you most recently shop in?
5) Who’s the last person you spoke to over the phone?
6) Where’s the last place you vacationed?
7) When was the last time you kissed someone of the opposite sex?
8) What’s the last thing that made you laugh?
9) What’s the latest app that you downloaded on your phone?
10) What’s the last kind thing you did for someone?

Aaaaaand here are my answers, Vloggy Style!

Enjoy! Pop on over to Kenlie's blog and play along! Make sure you leave a comment so you can get the comment love on your own post!

Have a great day, everyone!

(ETA: I just wanna say I LOVE FMM. I woke up excited to get to work and see what today's topic was, and now that I've made my post, I'm sad that it's over. Hurry up and go comment on Kenlie's post so I can go read more blog posts!)

Grumpy and Discouraged

2011-08-18T12:34:00.000-04:00

I've written and deleted and re-written and deleted about three things this morning, and I wasn't even sure I wanted to publish this blog today.

But sometimes we have to get real.

I'm grumpy. I'm discouraged. And I'm disappointed in myself.

I've made some good eating choices this week, but the weak moments have definitely triumphed. and I feel gross because of it.

I've gone back to only taking pictures from the boobs UP because I'm unhappy with how soft I feel/look. See above about poor eating choices.

I'm so tired of being hot. I can't make myself want to run at 6am when it's ONLY 89 degrees outside and when I WANT to run, it's 104. So I don't go. Therefore, I haven't run since last Thursday's cool run in the rain.

I am afraid to be this brutally honest because I've been so slammed for "spiraling" or having a "negative online personality" that I feel like everything that comes from my fingertips to this blog needs to be uplifting and sunshine and puppies and rainbows or else I'll be outcast (again).

I need some rejuvenation. I need cool breezes. I need to drink hot coffee drinks without sweating. I need to be able to wear my scarves and long-sleeved tees again.

I'm ready for a shift/change in gears.

I feel restless and grumpy.

Anyone else out there feeling this? Or is it just me (oh dear GOD I hope not)?

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 12

2011-08-17T18:08:00.000-04:00

Happy Wednesday, friends! It's time for another installment of Life Well Lived over here at Music and Baseball. First of all -- WELCOME to the new readers I've gotten lately! My stats have really spiked over the last week or so, and I couldn't be more thrilled. More blog readers definitely make me wanna keep blogging, so keep stopping by and keep commenting. I love it!

So, what is Life Well Lived? It's very simply a celebration of the things (big or small) that enrich our everyday lives. So let's talk about today's things that, I feel, make my life WELL LIVED.
(Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!)

1. I started a book club! And we've already had 3 meetings (and counting...).

As part of my 101 in 1001 goals (see tab at the top of this page...I guess one of my goals should be to actually FINISH THE LIST, huh??), I have started a book club! We had a meeting last night to discuss The Jungle by Upton Sinclair (not one of my favorite books, but hey...it's all about trying new things, right?), and it was a really great discussion. Now we just need to get more members! (hint hint)

2. I've now left 5 (of 50) Operation Beautiful notes!

Another of my 101 in 1001 goals was to leave 50 Operation Beautiful notes in different places and photograph each one. Click on the Operation Beautiful tab at the top of this page to see what I've done so far, and BY ALL MEANS, start carrying post-its and a sharpie around with you and do the same! I guarantee you it will change your whole day around and you just may make someone else's day.

3. I still crack myself up (especially when it comes to conversations with my Bestie/Evil Twin Shelly).

I may or may not have made myself laugh for a good 5 minutes after this text conversation happened yesterday...and TRUST ME, there are so many more gems that I could be posting...I just had to pick a (relatively) PG-rated one to post on the ol' blog. ;) Shelly is one of the few people that have been around for over 2 decades in my life, and seriously? We laugh. all. the. time. It's awesome.

4. I have a "local haunt."

I've already given some of the reasons I Heart Denton on this blog, but I REALLY REALLY DO love my little hipster/hippie town. One of my favorite things about Denton is my very favorite bar -- The Loophole.

It (and another bar I love across town called II Charlies) is owned by a friend I used to wait tables with about (gasp!) 13 years ago. It's got a great atmosphere, great drink specials....I just love it. It's my go-to place with friends, and very very likely where I will spend my 30th birthday. Low key and awesome. Love it.

(No really, I'm not an alcoholic...haha..ha...*awkward silence*)

So now it's your turn! Pick a few things and tell me why your life is WELL LIVED! Comment! Put a link to your list! And have a great day!

Friend Makin' Mondays -- The Driving Force

2011-08-15T11:44:00.000-04:00

I got a lot of great traffic on last week's Friend Makin' Mondays post and frankly it just made MY day to write that letter to myself!

It's Monday, which means it's time to play again!

Here's today's topic that Kenlie chose:

FMM: The Driving Force

What is the driving force behind your weight-loss?

Hmmm. I could be very simple with this or I could get a little deep on you all....I'll try to find a balance, how's that?

If you click on the Healthy Living tab at the top of this blog, you'll get a quick rundown and some of my favorite links from when I started my weight loss journey up until fairly recently (a couple months ago...I should really update that page).

When I started my weight loss journey, the driving force was that I hated the girl I saw in pictures. It's a strong sentiment to say that I "hated" her, but....I kinda did. That's not the person I saw when I looked in the mirror. I guess my self-image wasn't too terrible, huh? But the cold hard facts were there: the number on the scale, the size on the tags of my clothes, and, if I'm honest, the way I felt every time I went shopping, got dressed, was around thinner girls, etc. The part of me I buried down deep within me and convinced myself didn't exist because I was happy! I was accepted! I was talented!

So I changed my lifestyle habits. And I made a LOT of progress in one year.

Then, once the weight started coming off and the attention started pouring in, I felt amazing. I thrived on the attention and the compliments. And if I'm honest...again...I focused too much on that part. I started to lose myself a little bit and become a little bit more vain and self-focused than I should have been. My relationship suffered some and my priorities were in the wrong place.

I had a bit of a wake up call after the 3-Day walk, when my feet and legs were way too banged up and painful to really work out like I had been. I gained some weight back...along with some perspective. There were other factors that helped with that...some relationship revelations...some spiritual growth and personal growth...etc. (This is the part where I'll save you from a SERIOUS trip into Mandy's brain. You're welcome.)

So while of course there is still a driving force to want to fit into that One Special Size of jeans and to play that One Dream Role and to feel good about myself and be pretty and get compliments (don't tell me you don't love getting attention! the day I stop loving attention is the day hell freezes over!)....I'd say my driving force NOW?

I want to be healthy and live a long and fulfilling life.

I don't want the old laziness and complacency to return and be the cause of health problems.

I don't want the manic desire to be thin and pretty to return and cause problems in my mental and physical well-being so that I lose focus of the person I really am inside.

I want to maintain a healthy attitude towards my size and appearance and take pride in how I look, but I don't want it to define me.

I'd rather be remembered for being joyful, happy, healthy and loving than for being hot.

I may always have thick legs...but they will carry me across finish lines and help me in lifting and chasing after my (someday) children. I may always have a round behind, but it will never cease to be smacked when I walk by my husband. ;)

Last thought: I went to a funeral recently and as I sat there and contemplated my mortality, as we all are wont to do in that situation, I prayed fervently and earnestly that the Lord would keep me on this earth until I am old and gray so that I may experience ALL that this earthly realm has to offer. He has the ultimate say, of course, but I have a responsibility to make sure that I keep myself as healthy and happy as possible so as to prolong the life I've been given.

So. What's YOUR driving force to lose weight and be healthy?

Fitness Friday (I KNOW!)

2011-08-12T11:10:00.000-04:00

So, remember how it's been WEEKS since I posted a Fitness Friday blog? Yeah. It's because I've been ASHAMED, people! I haven't been completely lazy, but I've gotten about as close to doing nothing as possible. I could blame the heat. I could be REALLY lame and blame my period (ewwww! run away, boys!). But I won't. I've run a few times...walked the pup a few times...but I've been spending a LOT of time doing awesome things like coloring at coffee shops and getting my picture taken and sleeping.

Healthy LIVING, right? RIGHT.

ANYWHO.

I haven't been exactly active (exercise-wise, anyway) this week, either, but I did want to talk about a major accomplishment I felt yesterday.

As you may or may not know if you aren't living in Texas right now, yesterday ended a 40 day streak of days with temperatures at or above 100 degrees. Yes, it feels like the bowels of HELL. I ran on Monday afternoon at the indoor track in the gym (which is boring) just because it's too hot to be outside after about 9am. Well, I packed my gym bag yesterday expecting to go run indoors again after work, because I was DYING to run again this week(I know...WHO HAVE I BECOME??).

However, around 1pm, something strange happened. It got very cloudy outside...and dark...and the wind picked up...

Out of sheer curiosity, I logged on to weather.gov and saw that the current temperature was SEVENTY NINE DEGREES. I immediately changed into my running clothes, grabbed my iPhone and took off outside.

There were sprinkles of rain on my face!! It was WINDY and the gusts were COOL! Seriously, I was running with a giant smile on my face because it felt so great outside! Everyone I passed walking on campus smiled at me, people seemed to have a spring in their step....we so badly needed that brief reprieve from the heat! I couldn't help thinking about the way Phoebe runs on "Friends."

My iPod was rocking with me:

I stopped towards the end of my run to snap a picture of the clouds, just for evidence in case it doesn't happen again for months:

When I got back to my office, I checked my iMapMyRun app to save my workout and saw that I ran my best time per mile EVER. Yes, I'm still slow, compared to most "real runners," but just some data for you...
I checked my past workouts and saw that on June 2nd I completed a 2.25 mile run at a pace of 16:26 per mile. Yesterday I completed a 2.25 mile run at a pace of 13:06 per mile.

Boom. I was a happy girl.

Of course, after the rain passed, the clouds also disappeared and the temperature rose back up to a nasty and humid 97 degrees...but no matter, because I had jumped at the opportunity to get outside and feel a cool breeze on my face and feel strong and fast(er) and HAPPY!

HAPPY FRIDAY, FRIENDS!

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass…It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” — Vivian Greene

Lesser Self vs. Higher Self -- A Diptic Project

2011-08-11T17:02:00.004-04:00

The amazing Lindsay, (her photography blog is here, and all photos in this post were taken by her), who is a founding member of the Denton Women's Collective (I can't wait til we have a web site so I can hyperlink it when I blog about our meetings and current projects!), recently photographed me for a project she's been working on. She wanted to put two photographs of her subjects side by side—photos which depict the subject's "Lesser Self" vs. their "Higher Self."

Being the camera whore that I am, I volunteered to be part of her project. She asked me to start thinking before I came over to her loft for the photo session... "Think of your insecurity/proudest accomplishment or a name you were once called/a role you're aspiring to, etc."

My knee-jerk reaction when I think of "insecurity" is usually my weight or my size, but when I really stopped to think about this, I realized...it's not what really bothers me. People can call me fat or ugly or whatever, and it will, of course, hurt my feelings...but the fact of the matter is, I don't for one second believe that I am ugly. I don't think that I'm fat (anymore), either. I still have goals, sure...I want to lose some more weight and be able to run a 10k some day, but I don't think I'm "fat." So, what is something someone has called me or said to me that truly felt like a punch in the stomach?

I didn't want to admit this...which is why I ended up using it for the project...

In recent months, I was told by a small handful of friends/theatre colleagues that I was one or more of the following things:

Mean
Hurtful
Negative

...and then the knockout punch that sent me into a tailspin:

Judgmental

I mean, let's face it. We're all a little bit judgmental. Theatre people are, I daresay, the worst about it. Mostly because we're also some of the most insecure people on the planet, but that's another post for another day and time.

But...the person who called me this said it in a long line of attacks on my character and, based on the numerous discussions this person and I had had about my faith and his questions of faith, I knew that it was more than just talking about a soprano I didn't like or someone who had no business playing an ingenue at that age.

I felt like it was an attack on an area where I feel the most afraid and the most vulnerable (and often, where I feel I fail the most consistently) -- my faith and my relationship with God.

I've said before how afraid I am of alienating people or becoming unrelatable (that's a word, right?) or coming across as being "better than" anyone because of my faith, and this person knew that, and so I felt like he chose that word as the killer blow very carefully and purposefully. I remember that day so painfully clearly because I sat in my friend Jo's car and just ugly cried like a toddler (you know, the hiccuping, can't breathe kind of crying that's SO attractive) because I felt like I'd failed. As a friend and as a Christian.

It broke my heart.

Since then, I've come to terms with the fact that, yes, I can and WILL make better judgment calls and think more clearly about the ramifications of things I post/say/write...we all can, right? But a lot of what it comes down to is this:

I can control the motivations behind what I say and do, but I cannot control everyone's reactions.

All I can do is continue to try my own personal best every day to be the best Mandy I can be. I will still be snarky and catty at times, which may come across as judgmental...I will mess up, but that does not make me a failure or a terrible person...and I will try my very best to be loving and kind and positive. That's the "higher self" I will aspire to be.

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 11

2011-08-10T17:34:00.000-04:00

Hello, readers! It's WEDNESDAY, so that means it's time to celebrate LIFE WELL LIVED!
In case you needed a reminder, LIFE WELL LIVED is all about celebrating ALL the joys in your life, both big and small.

(Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!)

Let's get to it, shall we??

Today is kind of a special day for LWL, because I'm using part of a project I'm working on with the wonderful ladies of the Denton Women's Collective I've been a part of for a couple of months now. At our last meeting, I asked each girl to send me a picture of herself that she loved along with 10 things she loves about herself. Here are a few that I've gotten so far, with my own at the bottom (click on the pictures to see the larger versions):

1.) Brittany

1. I have smooth, soft skin like a baby. Seriously, I forgot to put lotion on this morning, but you could never tell by rubbing these elbows.

2. I have really, really good taste in music. Ok, look, I know this could be considered subjective, and I definitely make up for it when it comes to television (Jersey Shore comes back this week….GTL, baby!), but my music collection runs the gamut from The Band to The Avett Brothers and everything in between, and I think that’s pretty awesome.

3. I have a big ol’ booty, I’m good with that! No matter how many lunges and squats I do, it’s just not going anywhere, but that’s ok. In fact, it’s one of the few parts of my body that I don’t often wish was smaller. It makes me feel curvaceous and feminine and besides, even white boys got to shout, baby got back.

4. I’m almost always willing to give someone a second chance. Sometimes this makes people say I’m too nice (as if there is such a thing!), and sometimes it means I have to learn my lessons the hard way (just fyi, the FIRST time your boyfriend lies to you would be good time to dump his ass). But it also means that when a friendship or relationship ends, I can leave it knowing I gave it my all, feeling peaceful about the way I handled things.

5. I’ve been told I have a warm smile. You know how the best compliments always come from a stranger, someone who has absolutely nothing to gain from being nice to you? Well when I was in college I got a call from a family looking for a nanny, and I had to tell them that I had just found a job and wouldn’t be able to interview with them. They told me they were disappointed because that had seen my picture and loved my “warm smile.” Isn’t that one of the greatest compliments you ever heard?! That was 8 years ago and it’s stuck with me!

6. I’m good at being an adult. That sounds silly, but I’m really proud of the fact that I live on my own, am financially independent, and can put together a console table all by myself (and in less than 20 minutes, holla!). And when my boyfriend of six years cheated on me on a business trip, I moved out of our house without once losing my shit and slashing his tires or throwing his electronics out of a second-floor window. If that’s not something to be proud of, I don’t know what is!

7. I have awesome hair. I was at the mall a few weeks ago, and as I strolled through the purse department I overheard a clerk say to her co-worker, “That girl’s hair is so cute! I think that’s how I should cut mine.” And while I’ve been pulling my hair back mostly just to avoid, you know, DEATH, during this summer heat wave, four people have told me they love my little pony tail this week alone! Sure, this is mostly thanks to my awesome hair stylist, but hey, I rock it!

8. I am a hard core planner. My absolute favorite Christmas gift last year was a “Life Planner” my brother gave me. It has my name on the front and pockets and tabs and stickers and just….guh….it’s ridiculous the amount of pleasure it brings me. I’ve recently become obsessed with the ColorNote app (Post-Its on your phone!!!) and I can make a list like nobody’s business. Sometimes I feel like I need to focus more on being spontaneous and going with the flow, but being such a planner means I’m able to arrange days off work to hit up a music festival, or put together an awesome bachelorette party for my best friend, or even help plan an awesome community outreach event for young girls!

9. I kind of have great boobs. They’re small enough that I can get away without wearing a bra when it’s 109 degrees out (seriously, c’mon, mother nature!), but existent enough to look pretty hot in a low cut shirt.

10. I can say with certainty that I touch people’s lives. This is most definitely the thing on my list I am MOST proud of. I work with kids with learning disabilities, so almost every single day I have the opportunity to make a difference for them. There are days I want to bang my head against a wall while simultaneously poking myself in the eye with a pencil. But then someone goes and does something amazing, like reading an entire page from a grade-level book without a single error, or clearly articulating the difference between multiplication and division, or giving me live frogs for teacher appreciation week (yeah, that for reals happened) and I remember why I am so incredibly proud of what I do. A kid told me once, “Ms. Sassaman, I’m getting smarter, and it might be because of you.” And that’s plenty of reason to love myself right there.

2. Vassi

3. Rachel

4. Mandy

Also, I've been toying with the idea of making my own commercial like the now famous Dove commercial (seen here), and I decided to give it a shot yesterday. The commercial shows how quickly a very beautiful woman is turned into someone completely unrecognizeable, but who is the person we see on billboards and magazine advertisements for cosmetics. I actually feel like with this song I should be taking OFF my makeup, but I think that the message this ends up sending is that it's kind of sad how much time we spend (yes, I'm guilty of it) putting on makeup and trying to enhance ourselves. There's some irony in there, so I kept it the way it is.

I encourage you to try EITHER of these projects to remind yourself that you are beautiful JUST the way you are made. Wear makeup, sure, and feel girly (like I talked about here in my girly questions Vlog), but remember that you really are perfect just the way you are!

Friend Makin' Mondays -- Letter to Myself

2011-08-08T12:11:00.001-04:00

So, if you'll recall my awesome Vlog post from last week that I got from Laura, who apparently got it from a blog called All the Weigh....it was apparently part of a series called "Friend Makin' Monday."

Because I need yet another day-of-the-week blog post idea (no really! it keeps me blogging!), I think I'll play along again.

Today's theme is "A Letter to my Future Self." How interesting and appropriate! See, I'm working quietly on a blog post and project right now with the women in the Denton Women's Collective I've been meeting with for a couple of months now. I've asked each girl to do 2 things: 1) take a current picture of yourself that you love, and write down 10 things you love about yourself, and 2) find a picture of yourself from middle school/early high school and write a letter to yourself at that time in your life (i.e., "Dear Middle-School Mandy....").

ALSO, one of my DayZero/101 in 1001 tasks is to write a letter to myself to be read when 1001 days have passed. SO THIS IS PERFECT!

So here goes.

Dear Future Mandy,

Today is a Monday, and you're having a good morning so far. Also, your hair looks kind of awesome, considering that you slept on it wet:

I just want to tell you a few things about your current life that I hope you are still recognizing and remembering in a few years:

Right now you're approaching the end of what will be a 5 month break from theatre. You've really enjoyed being at home with your husband and pup, reading books, watching baseball, and making your life well lived. Performing is important to who you are as a person, but spending time with friends and family and time by yourself and for yourself is both good and necessary for your soul and your peace and happiness. Don't forget that. Nobody wants another 2009.
You are currently about 15 pounds from your goal weight. But you care about that number less and less the more active you are and the more personal goals you reach (right now you're hoping to be ready for a 5k in September and possibly a 10k after that) and the happier you are with your life (see above re: taking breaks). Being a size __ is important to you as a personal goal, so I hope that you've reached that point by then, but more than anything I hope you are even more healthy and fit and happy than you are right this minute.

Lately, you've been focusing on your husband and the people who are truly important to you in your life, rather than having a HUGE circle of "fringe friends." I hope that, by the time 1001 days are over and you're reading this again, that you've continued to invest in the frienships that truly matter and that those friendships are even stronger.
You've currently been deleting your devotional emails along with all the junk mail you receive overnight. STOP DOING THAT. Remember how much happier and more peaceful you felt when you took a measely 10 or 15 minutes to read them while you drank your coffee? Yeah.

You are 33 YEARS OLD right now. Holy. Freakin. Crap. When I wrote you this letter, you were only 29. Now, not only are you in a whole new decade, but you probably have children. So let me just say these things:

Do not let having children keep you from being healthy and fit (see above).
Do not let having children keep you from having sex with your husband consistently.
In that same vein, your husband is not another of your children. He is your husband and your ally.

I don't really have much else to say...I'm sure I'll think of other things along the way, but these seem to be pretty important.

Above all, Future Mandy? I hope and pray that you are happy. I hope that you're happy in your life and in your relationships and in your job and that you continue to recognize on a daily basis that, even when things seem shitty? You're still doing pretty well for yourself as far as your life goes. Don't ever stop finding the silver linings to your cloudy days, and if it helps? Keep blogging about them every Wednesday to remind yourself.

Take lots of photos, write things down (or blog them...who are we kidding, nobody actually uses a pen and paper anymore), give hugs and tell people you love them, laugh a lot, and try to make someone else smile.

You, Future Mandy -- are awesome. I should know, because I, Present Mandy, am awesome.

Love,
You

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 10

2011-08-03T09:00:00.013-04:00

Happy Wednesday! Today is my 10th Installment of "Life Well Lived!" I didn't post last week because I had some things in the works that I really wanted to put all on one post as a BONUS to the 10th posting in this series!

In case you needed a reminder, LIFE WELL LIVED is all about celebrating ALL the joys in your life, both big and small. Just because I feel like 10 is such a nice, round number, here are the previous 9, in case you were curious:

Week 1: College, Babies, The Today Show, and Frivolous Purchases
Week 2: Paychecks, The 3-Day Walk, Politicians and Outdoor Concerts
Week 3: Blogger Meet-Ups, Rooftop Parties, General Silliness and a Disney Honeymoon
Week 4: Mavericks Mascot, Real-Life Movie Moments and My Best Friend's Wedding
Week 5: Neeley's Guest Post!
Week 6: Cover Girl, Mama Morton, Celebrity Tweets and Baking Cookies
Week 7: International Kissing Day!
Week 8: Excerpt from The Cellist of Sarajevo
Week 9: The "Girlfriends" Edition

I think the most important thing I have taken from doing these posts every Wednesday is that I have been seeking out opportunities to make my life even more well lived than it already is. I think that's really the point...both recognizing the awesome things and blessings in your life as well as taking the opportunity (or opportunities) to create more. This week? IS A DOOZY!

(Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!)

Let's get to it, shall we??

1. I sat at a coffee shop with some tunes and a good friend....and COLORED.

My friend Heather and I got together last Wednesday, since we NEVER see each other, and on the way there, I got a wild hair and stopped off at the drugstore and picked up a brand new 64-pack of Crayola crayons and three $1 coloring books (Tweety & Sylvester, Penguins of Madagascar and Star Wars: The Clone Wars!). We drank chocolate milkshakes and colored and talked and caught up with each others' lives.

It. Was. Awesome.

Is there anything better than a brand new box of crayons??

I rule at the coloring. Look at that shading!

So excited about the coloring! I highly encourage you all to do this! Go by yourself with your iPod full of favorite tunes, or go with a friend and remember what it felt like to just be a little kid and color. It was very good for my soul!

2. I was recognized by my peers for playing one of my favorite theatrical roles to date -- with an award!

A couple of weeks ago was the Lakeside Community Theatre end-of-season awards banquet. I received the award for Best Supporting Actress for my role as Laura in The Glass Menagerie by Tennessee Williams...

And the entire cast was recognized and awarded for costume design (we all worked collaboratively to costume the show):

This was definitely one of my most rewarding theatrical experiences, and I was so very honored to be recognized both as an individual performer and as a cast. I miss this beautiful show!

3. I took a dance class with a dancer from So You Think You Can Dance!!

You may or may not already know that I am a HUGE fan of the Fox reality show So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD). I watch it religiously every Wednesday and Thursday night, and I've become incredibly attached to this season and its contestants.

Well, this past Saturday, July 30th, was the second annual National Dance Day, and while Chris Koehl was, sadly, voted off the show already, he came back to Texas to give some hip hop master classes -- and one was given at a local studio that is very close to my heart.

This is me with the owner of Denton Dance Conservatory, Miss Lisa Racine-Torre. I've known Lisa since I was a very young girl, because my very best friend of 20 years, Shelly, was one of the very first dance students at DDC. Here's a picture of Shelly in the studio:

My good friend Casey, who was in The Producers with me last summer, took the class, too. This is us before we got all sweaty:

The class itself? Well it went great! Was I the best dancer in the room? Hardly. There were 13-year-olds out-dancing me. Did I even nail the routine? Not even a little bit! Did I have an AMAZING time and enjoy every second of it? You bet I did!

Chris is one of the very nicest people I have ever met. He is so humble and kind and was so gracious to be back at the studio where he used to teach, and he answered every question and posed for pictures with and hugged every person in attendance.

It was so special to me to hear him talking to so many young girls (dancers, especially) about how what we do does not define us, but we have to learn and be comfortable and happy with who we are inside, as people and as individuals. And, as children of the Lord. Chris has so much potential for ministry and to bless everyone with whom he comes in contact. I am so blessed to have met him and to have had this amazing opportunity:

Here's one of my favorite dances of Chris's this season on SYTYCD:

My favorite thing Chris said during the whole class? "Joy strengthens you." At the time, he was making a point that enjoying yourself, whether or not you're getting the moves down technically perfectly, is going to make you a much better performer and much more fun to watch. But, after listening to him talk, I know that he means it on a much deeper level, too. I got tears in my eyes immediately when he said this!

You guys, what a GREAT couple of weeks I have had! I am so incredibly blessed to have these experiences and to have the opportunity to CREATE opportunities to have a more well-lived life. I strongly encourage you to do the same. Blessings can be found ANYWHERE!

Stop! Vloggy Time!

2011-08-02T21:58:00.000-04:00

I've been such a bad blogger...I haven't posted in a week! (Wow, remember when that statement used to be "month" or "year?" I'd say I've become a better blogger overall, so let's just focus on that, shall we?)

I didn't do Fitness Friday. I didn't do Tuesday Tunes. BUT! To make up for it (??) I am posting a VIDEO BLOG (aka "vlog") today!

Laura posted a vlog over on her blog and I thought "why the heck not?!" So here 'tis -- the vlog in which I answer a list of Girly Questions. Enjoy!

Tuesday Tunes -- Mish Mash

2011-07-26T13:30:00.001-04:00

You can call me lazy, it's okay...I just don't have the energy to choose an album and really tell you all about it today, but! In the spirit of Tuesday Tunes, I will share some YouTube videos of some songs I kind of can't get enough of right now. It's definitely a mish-mash of styles and genres, but hey...that's me! Enjoy!

Hawksley Workman -- "Autumn's Here"

The Civil Wars -- "I've Got this Friend"

Colin James -- "Into the Mystic"

The Trews -- "Man of Two Minds"

Adele -- "Turning Tables"

Catherine Wheel -- "Delicious"

What song(s) can you currently just not get enough of?

Fitness Friday -- Now with Live Tracking!

2011-07-22T11:39:00.001-04:00

So on Monday of this week, I got my early birthday present:

That's right, folks! I am now a VERY happy owner of an iPhone 4. I splurged and got the Otterbox case for it, because I am one clumsy MoFo, and since I plan to take the thing running with me, I need something durable. I didn't want the Otterbox at ALL at first, because they're a little bulky. But I'm happy with my decision. And the guy who sold it to me told me I'm "definitely a pink person," so I got one in pink and black. Woo hoo!

One of the most exciting things about this new phone is that, with the iMapMyRun app, I can turn on a live tracker while I run! GPS capabilities track my route for me and! if I so choose! I can turn on "live tracking" so that others with the app/with an account can follow me along my route! How cool is that??

So, Wednesday morning, I got up super early and decided to run outside (rather than on the indoor track at the gym) so I could test out the app. Not ONLY did I love the application, but I noticed that I took an entire MINUTE off of my per/mile time! I'm still slow as molasses, but to me, this was a HUGE accomplishment!

I used the app again this morning and was about 30 seconds slower, but I also stopped to take some photos with my fancy new HD iPhone camera, so maybe that had something to do with it.

I also love that I can listen to my iPod WHILE I'm tracking. Here's today's playlist:

I nearly died when "Kill the Lights" came on. It's a tough one to keep your own pace to, if you're not used to running that fast. But it was a great motivator. AND I couldn't have planned a more perfect cool down/stretch song than "On My Knees" by Seryn. Awesomesauce.

So! Here's my weekly recap:

Saturday: Yoga in the morning
Sunday: SYTYCD "Cardio Funk" workout (nearly killed me)
Monday: Nothing. Too sore to move.
Tuesday: Nothing, because I was lazy and used my book club meeting as an excuse.
Wednesday: 2.72 miles running
Thursday: Nothing (unless sex counts. Shut up and don't look so shocked! I'm married!)
Friday: 2.69 miles running

Whew! AND!!!! AND! I lost weight! I'm down about 2lbs since last Friday, so what a fun week, huh? I'm excited to keep going!

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 9

2011-07-20T12:05:00.001-04:00

Happy Wednesday! Today marks 9 WEEKS of "Life Well Lived" For NINE Wednesdays, I have blogged about the things in my life that I can recognize and celebrate and that make my life very well lived.

(Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!)

Today is the Girlfriends Edition of LWL for me. There are so many amazing women in my life, and this blog will show just a sampling of images of these fierce females (so please don't be upset if you don't see yourself on here. Chances are high that if you read this blog and you're a female, you're very special to me) along with some quotes about friendship.

Ladies...sometimes I couldn't get through the day without you. I love you all, and you're imperative to my high quality of life.

"Don't flatter yourself that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. The nearer you come into relation with a person, the more necessary do tact and courtesy become. Except in cases of necessity, which are rare, leave your friend to learn unpleasant things from his enemies; they are ready enough to tell them." — Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought I was the only one." — C.S. Lewis

"It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter." — Marlene Dietrich

"Time doesn't take away from friendship, nor does separation." — Tennessee Williams

"You know what the secret is? It's so simple. We love one another. We're nice to one another. Do you know how rare that is? - Carmen" — Ann Brashares (The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants)

"Those who cannot conceive Friendship as a substantive love but only as a disguise or elaboration of Eros betray the fact that they have never had a Friend. The rest of us know that though we can have erotic love and friendship for the same person yet in some ways nothing is less like a Friendship than a love-affair. Lovers are always talking to one another about their love; Friends hardly ever about their Friendship. Lovers are normally face to face, absorbed in each other; Friends, side by side, absorbed in some common interest. Above all, Eros (while it lasts) is necessarily between two only. But two, far from being the necessary number for Friendship, is not even the best. And the reason for this is important.

... In each of my friends there is something that only some other friend can fully bring out. By myself I am not large enough to call the whole man into activity; I want other lights than my own to show all his facets... Hence true Friendship is the least jealous of loves. Two friends delight to be joined by a third, and three by a fourth, if only the newcomer is qualified to become a real friend. They can then say, as the blessed souls say in Dante, "Here comes one who will augment our loves." For in this love "to divide is not to take away." — C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)

Tuesday Tunes -- The Civil Wars, "Barton Hollow"

2011-07-19T12:52:00.000-04:00

Source

I have been wanting to write a Tuesday Tunes about The Civil Wars for a couple of weeks now, but I was really hoping to be able to report back after going to their July 13th concert at the historic Texas Theatre (yes, the one where Lee Harvey Oswald was apprehended) here in Dallas, TX. UNfortunately, the concert was sold out for weeks once I discovered this incredible duo of musicians. FORtunately, they are awesome and, since they were sold out, they did a very short-notice, short set at Good Records in Dallas on the afternoon of the concert.

Thank God for Twitter, or else I would've missed it! I left work early on Wednesday of last week, drove down to Dallas, braving the traffic, the heat, and the lack of a/c in my car just to catch them singing a few songs. Let me tell you...it was worth every second.

They only played about 4 songs, but it was such an intimate setting and the chemistry between these two singers is so incredible, that it felt like a private concert, just for me.

Their debut album, Barton Hollow, is one that I haven't been able to stop listening to since I got my grubby little paws on it.

Check out the video for their single, "Poison and Wine," and just try to tell me that the chemistry between them isn't jumping off the screen and yanking out your heart:

They are so in tune with one another that you can almost feel them taking breaths at the same time. And listen to how his harmony sneaks in to seamlessly lock in with her at around the 1:56 mark. They even change dynamics together, swelling the sound when it's the absolutely perfect moment to, and then coming back off the sound in perfect harmony.

You know what's amazing? That's not all recording studio. They did that at the live show, too. They seem to read each others' minds when they sing together, and that is something very special to watch. Their performance makes their already beautiful music into something incredibly special. Remember when I talked about performance making all the difference? (Hint: It's right here.)

But they aren't all about the heart-wrenching lyrics found in "Poison and Wine," "Falling," and "Girl with the Red Balloon." They also have some light-hearted, upbeat songs that make the heart smile. My favorite is "I've Got this Friend," but "Forget Me Not" and "Barton Hollow" are equally amazing.

One more incredible thing about these two: they perform in a lovely, pared down setting—John Paul White on guitar and Joy Williams standing beside him and singing. That's it. No big, loud band behind them. No flashy light shows. There are some beautiful orchestrations and additional musicians on the album, but when they perform, there are NO distractions. It's all about their music and the harmonies and the lyrics (which, with the exception of "Poison and Wine," were all written by JPW and JW. P&W was written along with Chris Lindsey).

And to be able to take away all of the distractions and the decorations and just perform...and still take my breath away...proves to me that The Civil Wars are truly something special. PLEASE do yourself a favor and go buy this album immediately.

(oh and PS? They're LOVELY people. I turned into a babbling fangirl when I asked them to autograph my CD, and they could not have been nicer. I want to be best friends with them both.)

Fitness Friday -- All for the Best

2011-07-15T10:17:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I feel the need for the obligatory self-portrait on my Fitness Friday posts...I guess I just think a blog post sans pictures is boring. Plus, I'm having an unexpectedly good hair day...for now. When I go to lunch later and it's 103 outside, it will be ruined...so I wanted evidence that it started out well!

Speaking of starting out well...after last week's post where I was bemoaning my lack of motivation, I was determined to have a better, more productive week...despite things I already had planned...such as some auditions.

The auditions, I thought, went very well. I was happy with how I performed at each, and I was really trying to focus on what my friend Desiree brought to my attention recently, which is that, for just that small chunk of time, you are playing that role, whether or not you're actually cast in the production(s). So I enjoyed myself.

However, I was not cast in either show. I was disappointed, but only briefly. The peace I felt about the rejections (hate to call them that, but at 9am and after only one cup of coffee I can't think of a better word) has mostly to do with the fact that when/if I start rehearsals for another show, my routine will change even more. So I feel like it's important that I really get myself back into a fitness groove before I start rehearsing for another production. Not getting cast? All for the best. (shout out John)

So what did I do this week? Not a lot, granted...but I felt good about it:

Monday: Ran 2 miles and felt good.
Wednesday: Strength training while watching SYTYCD
Friday: Ran 2.5 miles and felt even better.

The plan is to do some yoga this weekend, because my post-run stretches are quickly becoming my favorite part about my workouts. I think my body is trying to tell me something...

So! Not a bad week, and I have much more of a feeling of accomplishment today than I did a week ago!

Hope you all have a WONDERFUL weekend!

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 8

2011-07-13T10:36:00.003-04:00

Hello, friends, and welcome to the EIGHTH installment of "Life Well Lived" The idea is to, every Wednesday, blog about the things in life, small or huge or anywhere in between, that make you joyful, that make you thankful...anything that makes your life WELL LIVED.

Don't forget to follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Blog, or just tweet about what makes your #LifeWellLived (don't forget the hashtag) and join in the fun!

Today, I'm going to keep it very simple (though, I do have some things up my sleeve for next week!). I'm currently reading a book called The Cellist of Sarajevo by Steven Galloway.

Source

Brief Synopsis (from the book jacket): A spare and haunting, wise and intelligent novel, The Cellist of Sarajevo is a testament to the endurance of the spirit and the subtle ways individuals reclaim the humanity in a city ravaged by war.

The subject of the book is quite serious and heavy...but there was a passage in the very early chapters that really spoke to me:

Ten years ago, when she was eighteen and was not called Arrow, she borrowed her father's car and drove to the countryside to visit friends. It was a bright, clear day, and the car felt alive to her, as though the way she and the car moved together was a sort of destiny, and everything was happening exactly as it ought to. As she rounded a corner one of her favorite songs came on the radio, and sunlight filtered through the trees the way it does with lace curtains, reminding her of her grandmother, and tears began to slide down her cheeks. Not for her grandmother, who was then still very much among the living, but because she felt an enveloping happiness to be alive, a joy made stronger by the certainty that someday it would all come to an end. It overwhelmed her, made her pull the car to the side of the road. Afterward she felt a little foolish, and never spoke to anyone about it.

Now, however, she knows she wasn't being foolish. She realizes that for no particular reason she stumbled into the core of what it is to be human. It's a rare gift to understand that your life is wondrous, and that it won't last forever.

Friends...I have had this moment. Blessedly, I have had it more often recently than in years past. It's incredible and overwhelming and leaves you feeling loved, vulnerable, afraid, and joyful. I feel like this passage really explains the kind of joy that Kelsey, the mind behind Life Well Lived, feels on a regular basis for her life and her set of circumstances at any given time.

So today, I encourage you to really be open and available to what God, the world, the universe is trying to tell you and show you. Let yourself be aware of just how wondrous your life really is.

Tuesday Tunes - The Spring Standards "Would Things Be Different"

2011-07-12T13:40:00.000-04:00

The band featured on today's Tuesday Tunes is one I discovered completely accidentally. And before you ask, NO, this one does not come from the friendly northern neighbor Canada.

A while ago...I'd say at least a month...Rachel and I planned to meet up at Dan's Silverleaf in Denton, TX to see The Andrew Tinker Band perform. The band starting off the evening was The Spring Standards. Normally I would just sit outside and hang out with friends while the band BEFORE the one I came to hear played, but this trio of incredible musicians hooked me in immediately. I was BUMMED when their set was over, even though I knew the awesomeness of Andrew Tinker was next to come.

Some things that are awesome about them, before I show you some clips:

Their female singer is a ginger
They have no drummer...they just divide up the drum kit between the band members. It's an awesome sight to see done live, I'm tellin' ya.
....um....they're awesome?? Seriously, I love their sound. Here's a couple of YouTube videos, but do yourself a favor and buy their album and TRY your hardest to go see them play live.

And then my favorite song...there are only live/concert versions, so I'm sorry...there's loud people and other annoying parts about trying to record a live performance of a badass song! (I didn't record this, btw).

Fitness Friday -- Y U No Here, Motivation?

2011-07-08T16:46:00.000-04:00

This is the face of someone giving herself a very half-hearted thumbs up for an attempt at getting back into something resembling a "groove" today. I ran for the first time since last Friday, and it was my first time at the gym since Tuesday of this week, when I did the elliptical machine for 35 minutes.

I've just...lost my motivation. I will attribute some of it to the fact that my week's have been all wonky what with vacation days and holidays, and I really do thrive on a routine (M/W/F running, T/Th cross-training/weights). And I'll give like a half percent of it to the existence of PMS and another half a percent to the EFFING TERRIBLE HEAT:

But I know those are just excuses. Since the shingles slowed me down, I've lost a lot of momentum. I've been a little busier in the evenings with plans with family/friends the last couple of weeks, but again...that's no excuse.

Time to get back ON THE WAGON, so to speak. I'm ready to feel accomplished again by the end of a week...like I've earned those weekend rest days.

So, here's a half-hearted thumbs up to me for getting back out there and doing SOMETHING today, rather than letting my weaksauce week of working out get to me, and rather than allowing myself to think "Well I have already sucked this week, may as well start fresh Monday." Nope.

As Heather says, "Make one healthy decision. Now make another." So this week is in the past, and we can make today a start into getting the momentum back.

Because I Have To

2011-07-07T10:00:00.001-04:00

First, watch this (the dance itself occurs between 0:45 and 2:45):

Do you STILL have goosebumps? I have seen it probably 20 times now and I get goosebumps every time. Without fail.

This routine has re-lit a fire in my heart and I've been wanting to write/blog about this ever since I saw it live...but it's so hard to put into words how it made me feel and how it so captured precisely why I love performing. No...why I have to perform.

There have been some absolutely incredible dance routines that I've seen on So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD from her on out...), even in the short time that I've been keeping up with the show. I've also been bombarded (in the most awesome way) with YouTube clips of everyone's favorites from seasons I didn't watch. But this one is going to be hard to top.

Do you want me to tell you why? Because of the acting. Is the choreography brilliant? Yes. Is the execution damn near perfect? YES. But it's the acting that sells it. It's the performance of the piece and the commitment to storytelling done by the two performers. As I said, I've watched this over and over and OVER and I can tell you that there's not one beat of this dance that Melanie and Marko aren't completely committed to the story and to the characters they are playing.

It makes me want to be one of the characters.

If you advance through some of the craziness of the judges' comments (which are pretty hilarious...), you'll hear Kristin Chenoweth say to them what I haven't been able to put into words when it comes to why this show speaks to me:

"We sing because we can't speak anymore. Dance is an extension of that. We can't speak anymore, so we move. You are the epitome of the kind of language I understand."

YES. As a performer myself and as someone who, in my own opinion, was created to love and experience this kind of artistic expression...that is how I feel.

When I watched this performance live from my own living room last Wednesday night, I couldn't stop crying. Not because of the story of the piece (that was part of it) but because I felt my heart ache to be a part of something that special again.

I'v been talking to some friends recently about the phenomena I mentioned above...the idea that when something truly special is happening in a performance (dance, recital, play, movie, musical, etc.), there's a part of you that feels yearning...the need to experience that yourself. It's almost like envy...jealousy...but without the negative connotations associated with those words. It doesn't even have to be a dramatic moment...it can even be the phrasing done by a singer of a certain song, or the impeccable timing of witty, comedic banter.

But what you're really seeing? Is complete understanding of the piece and the character, commitment to decisions, and a willingness to abandon oneself to the scary (but awesome) vulnerability of complete immersion in a moment in that character's story. And that's why it's so special to watch, to hear, to experience as an audience member or a listener or a viewer. It's like an intimate party that only you are invited to...even if you're in an audience of thousands.

For all of you who ask me why I will commit two months of my life to a role, why I have to almost literally sit on my hands to keep myself from attending auditions every time they come up and why it means so much to me that I can't stop tears during performances sometimes (my own or others')...the answer is both complicated and beautifully simple:

Because I have to.

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 7

2011-07-06T12:26:00.000-04:00

Today is Lucky Number SEVEN of my "Life Well Lived" series. Life Well Lived was created by the one and only Kelsey, and the idea is to, every Wednesday, blog about the things in life, small or huge or anywhere in between, that make you joyful, that make you thankful...anything that makes your life WELL LIVED.

Don't forget, you can also follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Follow and post with the hashtag #LifeWellLived and share with us what makes your:

Today is apparently INTERNATIONAL KISSING DAY! Woo hoo, what a thing to celebrate! As you will see, I am a big fan of kissing. Being in theatre makes that habit even more fun! ;) So today, rather than explaining, I will just show you that I have in fact had a life well lived with LOTS of affection!

First and foremost, though....my FAVORITE kisser:

Love love LOVE kissing that husband of mine! Now, for family, friends, and generaly kissy fun:

Lots of kisses in MY life, huh? :)

Now, it's your turn! Post 3-5 things that you think make your life well lived, and shoot Kelsey an email and let her know!

Guest Post -- An Act of KINDness

2011-07-01T10:18:00.000-04:00

Good morning and Happy Friday! Today, I am THRILLED to be featured as a guest poster over at Laura's blog while she is on vacation (lucky girl!). Laura is a fellow Healthy Living blogger and is studying to be come a registered dietician. I met her at the Blogger meet up we had while Heather was in town, and turns out she's great friends with someone I went to high school with. It's a small world! Anyway, here's a sample of my guest post on her blog...make sure you click on over to read the rest!

Hello readers of Becoming the Odd Duck! I'm very excited that Laura is letting me guest post while she is out of town. Guess what? This is my FIRST time ever guest posting on another blog, so I'm very excited about it.

I'm also excited about what I'm posting about today. Laura and I are, as you probably know if you're readers of either of us, part of an online community and network of Healthy Living bloggers. Now while I don't post recipes (ever) and I post about exercise only occasionally (read: when I have had a good week and not been as lazy as I'd like to be). I like to think that my blog is more about Healthy LIVING...meaning, things about my life that help me enjoy every moment of it — finding new musical artists, simplifying my life, performing, spending time with friends, etc. Exercise and eating well are very important to me because they will only help to extend my awesome life, right? RIGHT!

Earlier this week, I attended a meeting of the Denton Women's Collective, which is, quite simply, a group for women, dedicated to making a difference in our community and hopefully in the lives of other women. This is a group started by Lindsay, and my friend Rachel has been trying to get me to attend for a few months now. I finally was able to find time in my ridiculous schedule to attend and I am so very glad I did!

that's me in the green dress!

The subject of this month's meeting was the Kind Campaign, and the soon-to-be-released documentary Finding Kind. Here's the trailer for the documentary:

Started by Pepperdine University alumnae Lauren Parsekian and Molly Stroud, the campaigns mission is short but very clear and powerful: "A movement and documentary, based upon the powerful belief in KINDness, that brings awareness and healing to the negative and lasting effects of girl-against-girl "crime."

Click HERE to read the rest of this entry!

A Day in the Life - June 2011

2011-06-30T13:22:00.000-04:00

As part of my 101 in 1001 project (I don't even have close to 101 things on the list yet...maybe "Finish the List" should be ON the list?), I have set a goal to document 1 day of every month in photos. Yesterday I realized that I hadn't done that for June yet, and June was ending...like, today. So, even though it was quite possibly the most boring day in my recent history, here is my Wednesday:

Up at 5:20am -- ready to go run for the first time in a week:

What I leave the house with on gym days: lunch bag, purse, and gym bag. All too big and too heavy.

A very sleepy gym before it officially opens at 6am. Taken with my phone...it just captures the grimness of being awake that early to exercise. ;)

I decided NOT to take any workout (during or post-run) photos. You're welcome. At my office by 7:30, washing some coffee cups and other dishes and getting the coffee ready. Like the poster?

Breakfast! Homemade muffins from my mother-in-law, hazelnut coffee....and drugs. Wheeee. (Hey, calm down, it's a prescription!)

Very dull morning. Just doing some busy work lately until the July 1st catalog rollout. Mid-morning snack was an apple. Don't worry, I removed the sticker before actually eating it.

It's Wednesday! Time to create a Life Well Lived post!

...which took me to lunch time! Lunch was leftovers from a homemade chicken spaghetti I made. Yum yum!

More busywork for the afternoon. Then finally time to go home at 4pm! Luckily I got a parking spot in the shade all day! In 100 degree days, parking in the shade and cracking the windows a bit makes getting into the hot car a bit more bearable.

I'm "pet-sitting" for some friends who are in Maine all summer (the jerks! the weather is probably AMAZING there!), which means going to their house a few times a week and feeding the turtles. This is Yertle:

And this is Sheldon and Ginger. Their heads are above water because they are trying to bite my hands off. They're feisty little devils...

Unsure of Sheldon and Ginger. They would probably take my finger right off if I gave them the chance!

Finally home! Carmen always has to sniff/lick my feet to see where I've been. I know, it's kind of gross. But also adorable.

Okay Mommy, you may enter.

Aaaaand this is what I did for the rest of the night. Literally. Sat on my couch and watched So You Think You Can Dance and the Red Sox/Phillies game. BORING.

Seriously it was SUCH a boring day that I almost didn't want to even make this post. But today is the last day of the month and it's probably going to be equally boring, and I said I'd do it for the project so....yeah. Hopefully July's "Day in the Life" post will be a bit more exciting!

Have a great day!

The Audition

2011-06-30T12:14:00.000-04:00

(this post is cross-posted here)

This is a photo I took at an audition last week for part of the 7 Days project over on Flickr (it's fun! you should play!). Since I knew I had an audition right in the middle of the project, I had this idea for a photo in mind. Think of the end of the opening number of A Chorus Line, when the auditioners line up across the stage, holding their headshots in front of their faces. That's the general idea.

Once I played around with the color a little bit, this was the end result. And I'm kind of obsessed with how it turned out. It's not perfect. I'm in a bathroom, and you can pretty much tell there's a toilet behind me. The centralized color is the best I could do with the free version of Picnik. Ideally, you wouldn't be able to see me holding the camera. But that's okay...because I think all of that is kind of symbolic of an audition.

Rarely is the audition perfect. If you give perfect auditions, please, write a book and make millions sharing your secret with the rest of us goobers who sweat and shake and stammer and do our best to keep from getting cotton mouthed or short of breath right before a high note in a song!

So how did this audition go? I feel like it went really well. I always set personal goals when I go into an audition, and the weight and number of goals varies with each circumstance. Sometimes I know that the audition is purely for audition experience. There may not actually be a viable option for me in a particular production, but I will go....either because I want to try out a new monologue or song, get my face in front of a certain director at a certain theatre, or just to test the fates and make a director say, "Huh...she is not what I had in mind at all for this show, but let's see what she can do."

But I also love this photo because it's a bit symbolic. Ideally, you look very similar in person (aka "in real life") as you do in your headshot, but hopefully your headshot kind of rocks. When you walk out of the room, you want to leave with them a tangible bit of you that reminds them "Hey, I was the short, curvy girl with the hair that you weren't sure was red or blonde or some magical combination of the two!" But really, you're leaving them with just an image. A small piece of who you really are as a performer. You hopefully add to that with your audition, whether it's a monologue or a cold reading or 16 bars (carefully selected to include a slow section, maybe part of the bridge and at least one good money note), but even still...they're only getting a piece of you. It's just up to fate (also known as The Production Team) whether or not what they see is enough to bring you back for more...or offer you a place in the production.

You know? I almost think I'm starting to like the audition process. It's such a personal challenge. You basically get a chance to, for a few minutes, have all eyes on you. It's your chance to sell yourself. That's why I will never understand those who walk into auditions unprepared (not having read the script of the show beforehand, not having a song selection, etc.). YOU control those few precious moments, so do as much as you can with them!

And at a callback or a cold reading? You're getting the opportunity to play this role, even if it's just for a few minutes and a line or two. Make the most of it! Make choices. Look at your scene partner or, if you're alone in the scene/reading, really make strong choices! Even if you're wrong, let the director see that you are making an effort and, if you're cast, he or she will steer you in the right direction during rehearsals. (All of this is expanded upon in a GREAT book called, appropriately enough, Audition, which I highly recommend.)

One thing I also noticed at this last audition...please, for the love of everything good and holy and pure...shut up. Watch what you say in the lobby. Watch your language. Don't analyze every second and every note of your audition loudly so that you ensure everyone around you hears about it. Because frankly? Nobody cares. I know that sounds rude, but it's true. Everyone else is concerned about one person there: their own self and their own audition.

....not sure where I'm going with all of this really. I've just been thinking about auditions a lot lately as the next round or two comes up for me, personally. And I've just been kind of bullet-pointing things that are on my mind about them:

Be confident
Make choices
Think about what you're wearing before going (especially if movement may be involved).
Be nice to your accompanist. Introduce yourself, ask his/her name, THANK them.
Thank everyone, for that matter.
Be pleasant the entire time you're there. You never know who is watching/listening.
Be prepared.

....what would you add to that list?

Life Well-Lived, Vol. 6

2011-06-29T11:35:00.002-04:00

Today is the SIXTH (!!) installment of "Life Well Lived" the brain child of my good friend Kelsey! The idea is to, every Wednesday, blog about the things in life, small or huge or anywhere in between, that make you joyful, that make you thankful...anything that makes your life WELL LIVED.

Also, you can now follow @MyLifeWellLived on Twitter! Follow and post with the hashtag #LifeWellLived and let's make this go viral!

On to today's reason my life is well lived!

1. I've been on the cover of a newspaper...well a SECTION of the newspaper anyway!

Every Thursday in our local newspaper, there is an arts/entertainment mini-magazine type thing in the middle of the paper. Whenever a local production is in the works, the Thursday before opening night is usually when the show is featured in Denton Time. I've been in countless productions, but this is the first time I've been in a show/had a role in which I've been actually ON the cover! This was when I played Milly in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers in the summer of 2009!

2. I have learned a role in THREE DAYS!

In the fall of 2009, I auditioned for a local production of Chicago. I was called back and read/sang for the role of Matron "Mama" Morton, but I ended up losing the role to a very talented actress. Sadly, due to some personal circumstances, the actress had to leave the show with very short notice...one week before the production opened. The director talked to me on Sunday, I was at rehearsal Monday, we had a preview audience on Thursday, and the show opened Friday. Whew! Fear is an EXCELLENT motivator, and that role/experience still stands as one of my proudest accomplishments. Bonus: Hubby was also in the show as Billy Flynn!

3. A celebrity has replied to me on Twitter!

Last summer, the short-lived television show The Good Guys was filming in Dallas, starring Colin Hanks (total cutie and son of Oscar-winning actor Tom Hanks). I started ~~stalking~~ following Colin on Twitter and one day he tweeted that he was snacking on some almonds, which he found delicious. I grabbed my own bag of almonds (a great healthy snack, btw!), snapped a pic on my phone, and tweeted it to Colin. HE REPLIED. Yes, I was all twitterpated (see what I did there?) for the rest of the day!

4. Every year, my sisters-in-law, niece and I bake Christmas cookies!

Christmas 2008

Christmas 2010

On a whim, we decided to get together and bake Christmas cookies in December of 2008. My sweet sisters-in-law (my brothers' wives) and I, along with my then-8-year-old niece. We had a great time, wore dorky, dollar-store Christmas-themed aprons, and made a TON of yummy treats. We did it the very next year (no picture from 2009 that I can find...sad), and the NEXT year. This holiday season will be our 4th Annual Hilliard Sister Christmas Cookie Baking and I am already looking for recipes! It's a great tradition that I hope we continue (and continue to add children to) for years to come.

Now, it's your turn! Post 3-5 things that you think make your life well lived, and shoot Kelsey an email and let her know!

7 Days Wrap-Up: Summer 2011 Edition

2011-06-27T11:25:00.000-04:00

I'm part of a really awesome group on Flickr called 7 Days, in which members post self-portraits every day for seven days. Two of the days are theme days (different every time), and this summer edition was my second time to participate. (You can view my Spring submissions here.)

Seriously you guys? This group of people is at least 10 kinds of badass. I have SO much fun looking at everyone's creative, fun, beautiful, silly (insert other adjectives as you will) submissions and reading their comments. I will spend SO much time going through and commenting on everyone else's photos and laughing my head off (comment love is what it's alllllll about, yo).

You should definitely join the group. Just click on the link up there, and send a request, and play along with us in the fall!

So, here are my photos from this round, along with my captions:

7 Days, Day 1 -- Freckles & Lip Gloss

Hooray! 7 Days is back!

I thought this might be a good start to the Summer 7 Days cycle because it features some of my summer staples: freckled shoulders, sundresses, and lip gloss!

It's a toasty 102 degrees in Texas today, and I'd MUCH rather be out by the pool drinking frosty beverages, but lunch with the in-laws called. I hope you're all having a wonderful Saturday!

7 Days, Day 2 - Celebrating in Style! (Theme: BLACK)

As I mentioned yesterday, my father-in-law and his wife are in town this weekend. Tonight we celebrated both Father's Day AND his 60th birthday!

We were told to dress up, and imagine our surprise when a BLACK limo picked us up! I was wearing a BLACK strapless BCBG dress and hubs was wearing a BLACK shirt and coat.

We went to the Mansion at Turtle Creek in Dallas, where we spent a GLORIOUS 3.5 hours eating and drinking some incredible cuisine and having awesome conversation with family we haven't seen since our 2008 wedding.

It was an excellent day!

7 Days, Day 3 -- God, I Hope I Get It!

I was really hoping to be able to pull off this shot, and I'm pretty happy with it!

Tonight, I went to an audition for the musical "Gypsy" at a really amazing local theatre (only one in the area that uses 35-40 piece orchestras to play original Broadway orchestrations).

I sang really well, and I'm happy with it -- no matter how it turns out!

(Bonus points if you catch the reference in the title & the homage that is my pose!)

7 Days, Day 4 -- A Watched Pot

On the menu tonight? Chicken spaghetti. But it takes SO long for the water to boil and it gets SO warm in my kitchen in the summer that an ice cold Corona seemed to be just what the doctor ordered!

7 Days, Day 5 -- Sign says (woo!) "Stay away, fools!" (Theme: WHITE)

'Cause love rules...at the lo-o-o-ve shack! This is a GREAT new place to eat in Denton, TX -- the Love Shack!

I wore a white shirt today hoping to find a photo op to fit today's theme, and when Whitney (my sweet friend who helped me snap the photo) suggested lunch here I remembered the AWESOME wall outside! Voila!

7 Days, Day 6 -- In the Summertime

(note: this is a screenshot of a video submission)

It's been an interesting day. I got about 3 hours of sleep (I don't even know why...), I was up at the gym by 6am and at work by 7:30...then I had a doctor's appointment and found out I have SHINGLES. GAH! And might I add, "Ouch." I feel like a leper or something.

Also? It's back up to a kerjillion degrees outside, which makes it a gazillion and ten inside my car. But the local Oldies station was playing some summertime favorites so I decide to have a little fun for my 7 Days submission today.

Thank goodness tomorrow is FRIDAY.

7 Days, Day 7 -- Day of Rest

This is what I've been doing allllll day. I slept 12 hours last night, went to lunch with the hubby, nearly fell asleep on the 15 minute drive home, then took a 3 hour nap.

Think my body is trying to tell me something?

I'm feeling better, but the medication is making me feel a little weird. I hate ending 7 Days feeling under the weather,but once again, I've had a GREAT time!

I hope to see you all again in the Fall!

**********

So that's it for this round of 7 Days! Come play with us next time around! It's SO much fun!

Fitness Friday -- Listening

2011-06-24T20:46:00.001-04:00

I almost didn't write a post today, because after last week's awesomeness I feel like I really failed my body this time around.

I took Monday off from work because of an insanely busy weekend with visiting in-laws and a late night on Sunday at a VERY fancy celebration that included a limo and dinner at the Mansion at Turtle Creek in Dallas.

So my first day to work out this week was Tuesday. I ran 2.5 miles, as was the plan. Wednesday morning I completely overslept and rushed out of the house with only the essentials (read: coffee) and forgot my gym bag at home. BUT, I did try to make up for it by doing my legs workout while watching So You Think You Can Dance (lunges and other various means of torture designed to [hopefully] reduce the size of my thighs).

Thursday morning I got up after only getting about 3 hours of sleep for some reason. This is where all the old bits of advice to "listen to your body!!" started haunting me. I needed to run 2.5 miles. I told myself I'd do that 3x a week no matter what. Then I started hearing that obnoxious line in the back of my head again...

Listen to your body!

I wasn't feeling great. I felt really run down and tired. My right knee was a bit sketchy. And the rash that had been bothering me on my side was especially irritating. So I got on a stationary bike instead and rode about 6.5 miles in 35 minutes. Then I went downstairs and did arms/back/abs work.

By the time I got to work, I was feeling kind of yucky, still, so I called the doctor and made an appointment to have my little rash area looked at. She could fit me in at 2pm, so I went in after lunch....and found out I have shingles. Shingles. Ugh. Even my doctor seemed surprised.

Apparently, it's the chicken pox virus, which NEVER EVER GOES AWAY in your body once you've had it. It just lies there, waiting dormant, to screw with you. It can be "awakened" by stress, aging, or disease/low immune system. I don't feel particularly stressed....on the contrary, I've been feeling pretty good . I'm not letting the Summer Financial Woes get me down...I'm just trusting that, as always, God will provide and take care of us. I'm keeping myself healthy. I'm enjoying not being in a show right now. I'm reading. I'm sunbathing. But, maybe subconsciously my body is taking on some stress. I don't know. All I know is that OW this hurts and PLEASE give me some medicine now that you know what it is.

So I got some drugs for the Shingleshanks (what I'm calling them because it sounds more fun), and today? I have been completely worthless. I didn't run. I didn't bike. I didn't stretch. I didn't do yoga. I didn't do ANYTHING.

I slept for 12 hours last night, woke up and went to lunch with the hubster, barely stayed awake on the drive home from lunch, and then took a 3 hour nap.

Because my body told me to.

There's a part of me that feels stressed (stop it, Mandy. You want more shings??) and disappointed in myself for not meeting my weekly goals...but I know deep down that listening to your body and knowing when it needs a break is much more important than running the 7.5/8 miles I was hoping to get in this week. If I don't let myself recover, I'll have more bad weeks.

Here's hoping I get the rest I need, recover, and come back even more ready to kick some butt next week!